What Every BODY Is Saying : An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed Reading People

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DETECTING DECEPTION 215

Other clear signs of discomfort seen in people during a difficult or
troubling conversation include rubbing the forehead near the temple re-
gion, squeezing the face, rubbing the neck, or stroking the back of the
head with the hand. People may show their displeasure by rolling their
eyes in disrespect, picking lint off themselves (preening), or talking down
to the person asking the questions—giving short answers, becoming re-
sistant, hostile, or sarcastic, or even displaying microgestures with inde-
cent connotations such as giving the finger (Ekman, 1991, 101–103).
Envision a snotty and indignant teenager who is being questioned about
a new and expensive sweater her mother suspects was stolen from the
mall and you’ll have a clear idea of all the defensive maneuvers an un-
comfortable person can display.
When making false statements, liars will rarely touch or engage in
other physical contact with you. I found this to be particularly true of in-
formants who had gone bad and were giving false information for money.
Since touching is more often performed by the truthful person for empha-
sis, this distancing helps to alleviate the level of anxiety a dishonest person
is feeling. Any diminution of touching observed in a person engaged in
conversation, especially while hearing or answering critical questions, is
more likely than not to be indicative of deception (Lieberman, 1998, 24).
If possible and appropriate, you may consider sitting close to a loved one
when questioning him or her about something serious, or even holding
your child’s hand while you discuss a difficult matter. In this way you may
more readily note changes in touch throughout the conversation.
A failure to touch does not automatically indicate someone is decep-
tive, however, and physical contact is clearly more appropriate and ex-
pected in some of our interpersonal relationships than others. It is true
that a lack of touch may signify that someone does not like you, since we
also don’t touch those we don’t respect or for whom we have contempt.
The bottom line is that assessing the nature and length of the relationship
is also important in discerning the meaning of such distancing behavior.
When looking at the face for signs of comfort or discomfort, look for
subtle behaviors such as a grimace or a look of contempt (Ekman, 1991,
158–169). Also watch for a person’s mouth to quiver or squirm in dis-

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