What Every BODY Is Saying : An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed Reading People

(Brent) #1
GETTING A LEG UP ON BODY LANGUAGE 61

BOX 15: HOW FEET WAVE GOODBYE

When two people talk to each other, they normally speak toe to toe. If,
however, one of the individuals turns his feet slightly away or repeatedly
moves one foot in an outward direction (in an L formation with one foot
toward you and one away from you), you can be assured he wants to
take leave or wishes he were somewhere else. This type of foot behavior
is another example of an intention cue (Givens, 2005, 60–61). The per-
son’s torso may remain facing you out of social diligence, but the feet
may more honestly reflect the limbic brain’s need or desire to escape
(see figure 18).
Recently I was with a client who had spent almost five hours with me.
As we were parting for the evening, we reflected on what we had covered
that day. Even though our conversation was very collegial, I noticed that
my client was holding one leg at a right angle to his body, seemingly want-
ing to take off on its own. At that point I said, “You really do have to leave
now, don’t you?” “Yes,” he admitted. “I am so sorry. I didn’t want to be
rude but I have to call London and I only have five minutes!” Here was a
case where my client’s language and most of his body revealed nothing
but positive feelings. His feet, however, were the most honest communi-
cators, and they clearly told me that as much as he wanted to stay, duty
was calling.

feet away from you, this is information you need to process. Why did the
behavior take place? Sometimes it is a signal that the person is late for an
appointment and really has to go; other times it is a sign that the person
no longer wants to be around you. Perhaps you have said something of-
fensive or done something annoying. The shifting foot behavior is a sign
that the person wants to depart (see figure 18). However, now it is up to
you—based on the circumstances surrounding the behavior—to deter-
mine why the individual is anxious to go (see box 15).

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