Another Iceberg, Right Ahead 234
snap and go crazy. “I’d never seen him so sad,” his mother
Maye said. “Everything was collapsing around him.”^54 “For
a while there, it looked like I had lost my marriage and all
three companies [also SolarCity had problems] were going
to die,” Elon said. “At that point, every day was like eating
glass and staring into the abyss of death.”55,210
Working as the CEO of two companies and taking care
of five kids, Elon didn’t have any time to sleep. “I was
like, I’m fucked. What am I going to do?” he said. “I never
thought I was someone who was capable of a nervous
breakdown, but I think I came as close as I ever come
on December 22. I think once you snapped, you probably
don’t realize it because you have gone insane, and your
ability to look in the mirror psychologically is substantially
impaired.”51,331
When Elon had decided to invest the last pieces from
his past fortune in Tesla, he had a few million dollars to
cover living expenses. “This should have been fine, as,
relative to others with a similar net worth, I don’t spend
much money on personal matters,” Elon said. “I own no
homes (not even my residence at this point), yachts or
expensive artwork. My clothes are mostly jeans and t-shirts
and I almost never take vacations, apart from kid related
travel.”^440
But after the divorce with Justine, his expenses in-
creased. In a California divorce, the wealthier spouse has to
pay both sides of the battle. The legal and accounting bills
for the divorce grew to $170 000 per month. “Journalists
were quick to mock the poor ‘broke’ guy that had $200k a