Children as Special Patients 181
Sharing the burden
It will certainly help if the grown-ups and siblings can join in on the diet
and I usually recommend this. For one thing, this will give the rest of the
family a vivid idea of what it takes to go through with the program. Also
- and this is quite an important point – it will help the child not to feel
different or peculiar.
There is one other practical reason why families should join in.
From what you have read you will realize that it is most unlikely that a child
with allergies is the only one in the family to have them. After all, he or she
only eats what is offered; if the child’s diet is faulty, then so is that of the
rest of the family.
The probability is that the mother or father also has the problem,
perhaps without realizing it. But there is only one way for parents to find
out for sure, and that is to try the Diet Wise plan for themselves.
Almost everyone feels better on the elimination diet once the
withdrawal phase is over, so it is worth a try.
Mothers can be difficult I have found. There is an image of
motherhood, beloved by all, in which she is a fountain of ‘goodies’ such
as cake, sweets, cookies and delicious puddings. Children, sadly, may judge
her love for them purely in terms of this rather artificial archetype. It is
all very well in the pages of Enid Blyton or in the land of hobbits, but
in real life such outpourings from the kitchen can be deadly: Yes, deadly.
Countless husbands die early because of a wife’s well-meaning ignorance
in the kitchen.
Thus mothers (and fathers too) may try to be ‘kind’ to the youngster
by allowing sweets and other forbidden treats on the diet. Of course, in the
long term this is hardly being kind; it is downright irresponsible and may
rob the child of his or her rightful recovery. It is simply not possible to
cheat ‘slightly’ on this program and expect results. We are trying to clear the
bowel, and this cannot be achieved unless the regime is adhered to strictly.
Neighbors and relatives can be obstructive for the same misguided
reasons. Not understanding what it is that you are trying to do, they may
feel the child is being deprived and reason that it is perfectly all right to defy
your wishes in this matter. My advice is that unless you can be quite certain
of cooperation you should keep the youngster away from the care of family
and others for the period in question. It is only a week or two, and this
should pose no strain on family relationships.