How to Deal with Emotionally Explosive People

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but TV usually doesn’t work as well if the program is even slightly inter-
esting. You could try watching infomercials.


AVOID CAFFEINE AND ALCOHOL. People with sleep problems some-
times drink a lot of coffee (or tea or cola) to stay awake during the day.
The caffeine keeps you awake at night, perpetuating the cycle. A good rule
is to avoid caffeine after noon. Watch out for decongestants as well. Cold
pills with pseudoephedrine can be as stimulating as caffeine. If the label
says it won’t make you drowsy, it may well keep you awake.
Alcohol can put you to sleep, but it disrupts brain rhythms, so you’re
likely to wake up again in short order, possibly with a headache. One drink
in the evening may be beneficial, but more than that can create more
problems than it solves.


USE MEDICATION, BUT SPARINGLY. Everybody knows how easily you
can become dependent on sleeping pills. This assumption is at least partly
a relic of the days when sleeping pills were highly addictive barbiturates
to which people quickly built up a tolerance, so that it took more and more
to do less and less. Benzodiazepines, like Ambien and Halcion, have the
same problem, but create tolerance more slowly. These medications are
very useful however in breaking a pattern of insomnia, giving the sleep-
less hope and enough will to try other methods.
One of the most effective sleep medications is Trazadone, a sedating
antidepressant that metabolizes quickly and does not create a tolerance.
Cold medications containing antihistamines but no decongestants
may also help you to sleep. Antihistamines are the active ingredient in
most over-the-counter sleeping medications. They don’t build a physical
tolerance, but people can become dependent on them.
Health food stores offer a number of sleep-inducing herbs and
nutrients. Tryptophan and melatonin have some research support behind
them and are safe and nonaddictive. My clients typically don’t find them
to be particularly effective, but they’re probably worth a try.
Warm milk and herbal teas work for some people. The mechanism
may be as much the ritual as the chemistry, but do you really care?
Anxious people feel out of control, and will do almost anything to
regain their sense of mastery over their own lives. Usually they pick the wrong
thing, thereby creating more anxiety for themselves. Developing and fol-


138 ❧Explosions into Fear

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