match or the gasoline causes the blast? Disorders erupt at points of phys-
iological or psychological weakness. Faulty brains and faulty minds both
play a part, but neither can be called the ultimate cause.
Step 4: Separating Thinking, Feeling, and Acting
Whatever else it may be, depression is a distortion in thinking that causes
negative feelings, which lead to self-defeating actions, which cause more neg-
ative feelings, which further distort thinking, and so on. There are no
straight lines in depression, only downward-twisting spirals. Depressed peo-
ple believe that thoughts, feelings, and actions are inextricably connected,
trunk to tail, with feelings always in the lead. The goal of psychotherapy is
to stop the parade, or at least change the order of the elephants.
The I Just Don’t Feel Up to It Explosion
Depressed people let their feelings determine their choices. They always
seem to be waiting to feel better before they do what it takes to feel better.
Ask any of them why they didn’t go for their walk today:
“I just didn’t feel up to it,” Randy says, looking longingly at the
place where his couch used to be.* * *Carol zips by, carrying an armload of laundry. “The house is
such a mess; I’d feel guilty if I didn’t clean it first.”* * *“Seeing the lovers in the park makes me more depressed,”
Rachel says.The flaws in their logic are easy to see, but try explaining them. It’s
like rolling a huge rock up a mountain only to see it roll back down again
each time. The trick is to get depressed people to see the pattern, to some-
how get their despair to recognize itself.
Medications often make people feel better, but as an unintended side
effect, they enhance the perception that feelings lead the parade. Behavioral
188 ❧Explosions into Sadness