programmed with everything a dinosaur needed to know to survive in the
jungle. The limbic systemarose with mammals. It added emotion, rudimen-
tary memory, and motivation by reward and punishment to the mix. Theneo-
cortexsits on top of the other two. It can think, but only if properly engaged.
McLean’s triune brain theoryis a gross oversimplification, but it
describes aggression more fully than any model we’ve discussed thus far. In
general, the higher the arousal, the lower the brain structure, and the more
likely that people will follow their instinctive programming instead of thinking.
In the animal world there are several kinds of aggressive instincts. They
occur in different situations and follow quite different rules. If you want
to keep from being hurt in angry explosions, you must know these instinc-
tive patterns, since they describe the rules you’ll have to play by.
Predation
Predators never think about whether their lunch has feelings. You could
say they have disturbed object relations. Human predators share similar
disregard for their victims. They deserveto be eaten. Life is a game you
must win if you want to keep playing.
Predation is a no-brainer, or, more correctly, a reptile brainer. Words are
no protection; you can’t explain to a hungry dinosaur why it’s wrong to eat
you. All you can do is run, or shoot to kill. Instincts seldom allow much choice.
People think like predators when they’re enraged. They’re in contact
with their anger and little else. Forget trying to figure them out or reason
with them. They’re not using the part of the brain that can be reasoned
with. Get away, and deal with the situation at a later time. Anything you
say will be taken as further provocation, so say nothing, just run.
If someone like Brandon is chasing you, go to the closest, brightest,
most crowded place you can find, and make a lot of noise.
Being Cornered
It’s not just dinosaurs—even rabbits will attack you if they’re trapped. In
dealing with angry people, keep your distance. Instinctive rage at being
cornered often translates into a greater need for personal space, the bubble
of air around us that we treat as part of our bodies.
This need is determined by various factors. Different cultures, for
example, have different space requirements. Americans, especially those
226 ❧Explosions into Anger