How to Deal with Emotionally Explosive People

(singke) #1

whether they actually exist. Most battles for dominance begin with an arbi-
trary distinction, and never end.
The solution to the problem of unintended dominance disputes is
courtesy, the anti-instinct. In many cases, courtesy involves ritualized def-
erence, and apology for offenses both willful and otherwise. Which
reminds me: I’m sorry about the blatant sexism of the garbage vignette.
I’ll try to be more sensitive in the future. Please forgive me.


Defense of Territory


Animals defend what is theirs, be it food, land, mates, or whatever. In the
jungle, there is never enough to go around. If you share at all, it’s only
with those who are most like you.


In the mists by Gombe stream, a band of chimpanzees wanders
into another group’s territory. They know instantly. The air
smells different here.
In seconds other chimps approach, and pandemonium
begins. All of them are hooting, shrieking, jumping, pounding
the ground, and urinating all over everything. The activity builds
to a wild crescendo, then diminishes as the intruders back away
into the forest.

* * *

It’s lunchtime at Springfield High. Two long-haired slacker guys
in baggy clothes are basking in the sun on the steps by the main
entrance.
The varsity posse bangs and thumps their way out the
doors. “Look at these losers on our steps!” says a young meso-
morph in a letter jacket. “What are you little girls doing here?
This whole area is reserved for jocks.”
“Chill out, man. It’s a free country.”
The jocks circle the slackers.“Oh, yeah. Well I guess that
means we’re free to kick your ass.”

* * *

You pull up a stool at Cassidy’s and order a cold brew. There’s
an attractive woman sitting by herself two stools down. You

230 ❧Explosions into Anger

Free download pdf