where. Classical music is playing, and she can’t catch her
breath.The brain demands meaning in order to process memories and file
them away. Traumatic memories get stuck at the edge of consciousness until
the brain can figure out where to put them. Meanwhile, almost anything can
cause them to replay. The sound of brakes, the smell of spilled coffee, or the
embrace of a seat belt can turn a car crash into intense and immediate real-
ity. When these nightmares happen in the daytime, they’re called flashbacks.
People with PTSD are haunted by ghosts of memories too terrifying
to be laid to rest in words. Specters stand between traumatized people and
everyday reality, turning everything cold and sinister. Is it any wonder that
people with PTSD do whatever they can to make themselves numb? Many
resort to drugs, alcohol, or other addictions. Some learn to learn to hypno-
tize themselves into dissociation.
Hypnosis is nothing more than paying close attention to one thing to
keep from paying attention to another. A very common way that people
with PTSD do this is by getting involved with small irritations.
Trish knows she’s being too crabby, but she can’t stop herself.
People just don’t pay attention to what they’re doing. Leaving
the lights on costs a fortune, but the kids could care less. They
don’t pay the bills. And look at the mud on the carpet! She
marches the kids down to clean it up. Her husband suggests that
she’s being a bit overbearing. Trish hits the roof.Exorbitant bills, mud on the carpet, and tiny slights by loved ones
become huge to people with PTSD. If you’re fighting, at least you don’t
have to think.
Treatment involves calming the person down enough to approach the
traumatic memory and make sense of it so it can be stored. Nonnumbing
medications may help, but words are the only cure. Your job is to listen.
People in the midst of nightmares usually believe they’re completely
alone with their fear. The distance and irritability of people with PTSD
often turns this belief into a reality. Your other job is to be there when the
going gets tough and reassure them that they are safe and loved.
Explosions into Fear ❧ 81