100 How to Win Every Argument
drowning out any reasoned argument for the very good reason
that they are a lot more interesting and quite often of a higher
intellectual level. A few of them achieve the immortality of the
book of quotations as 'anonymous heckler', especially if their
interjection has prompted an even better reply from the candi-
date. Lloyd George, Winston Churchill and Harold Wilson all
showed adroitness at turning a diversionary joke back upon its
user.
QUESTIONER: What do you know about agriculture? How many toes has a
pig?
NANCY ASTOR: Why don't you take off your shoes and count them?Often cited as a classic of irrelevant humour is the joke by
Bishop Wilberforce when debating evolution against Thomas
Huxley. Pouring scorn on evolution, the bishop asked Huxley:
You claim descent from a monkey; was it on your grandfather's or
grandmother's side?
(Huxley's reply is also considered to be a classic put-down. He saw no
shame in being descended from a monkey, but described the man he
would be ashamed to have as an ancestor; a man who despite his
learning sought to obscure by means of aimless rhetoric and appeals
to prejudice...)The problem for the user of rational argument is that a guffaw
is as difficult to refute as a sneer. The audience enjoys the
entertainment more than the argument. A speaker for a religious
sect would regularly invite his audience to supply any biblical
quotation which conflicted with his view of things. When
members of the audience obliged, as they often did, he would
always reply: