The Writing Experiment by Hazel Smith

(Jos van der Sman) #1

The first line of the poem seems to suggest that cranberries overran logan-
berries. But the syntax (the word order and the way the words are
connected) is different from normal: the verb is at the beginning of the
line and the word loganberry is truncated. The next two lines suggest
flowers, fruits and aromas, but do not use a main verb, and are not struc-
tured with regard to subject, verb and object. There is a density and
compression here which is extremely sensory: the way in which words are
piled onto each other, and not submitted to grammatical subordination,
means that a number of stimuli are operating at once. This is a radically
different approach to the more conventional nature poem where the
poet’s relationship to, and feelings about, nature might be more directly
expressed. Such a nature poem requires grammar to express subject–
object relations.
To experiment with grammar and syntax (see Exercise 2c) try two
approaches:



  • Create a series of phrases in which you turn nouns into verbs or verbs
    into nouns. An example would be ‘the day lemons and dilates’ where
    the noun ‘lemon’ becomes a verb. You will find that some words have
    more than one grammatical function anyway, but try to find some that
    do not. Begin by producing a list of unconnected phrases. Then, if you
    like, go one step further and turn the phrases into a poem, but this is
    not the primary objective.

  • Write a short poem in which words are piled up without grammatical
    joiners. See what effect this has on the meaning.


Discontinuity


One of the main characteristics shared by most of the poems in this chapter
is discontinuity. The poem may keep abruptly changing direction, or there
may be unexpected shifts in voice or register. Discontinuity is as true, or
more true, to the way we perceive the world as continuity, and within
poetry it allows thoughts to develop freely and in several directions at once.
Discontinuity and fragmentation are also often effective ways of addressing
the gaps and fractures within memory and history.
These poems are sometimes a challenge to read because they move from
one idea to another without a smooth transition, but they also lend them-
selves to multiple interpretations and an active ‘writerly’ approach to
reading which is very rewarding. If you find that your writing always seems
to be very continuous, and that you always make everything in the poem
fit tidily together, try writing a more discontinuous poem (Exercise 2d).
Some ways you might do this would be to:


178 The Writing Experiment

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