boys are “yucky,” finding boys to “play house” gets near to im-
possible. Here and there, even in first grade, some pairing off hap-
pens, but for the most part the next glimpse of Hera comes later
when kids “go steady.”
PARENTS
Hera’s parents were Cronos and Rhea—a distant father who
swallowed his children, threatened by the possibility that one would
overthrow him, and a powerless mother who could not protect her
children from him. Cronos and Rhea provide us with a negative and
exaggerated picture of a patriarchal marriage: the husband is a
powerful, dominating man who will not tolerate competition from
his children or allow his wife to have any new interests. The wife
passively resists by keeping secrets from him and by using deception.
Hera was the only one of her swallowed siblings who had two sets
of parents. Once freed from her father, she was raised in an idyllic
situation with two nature deities as foster parents.
The theme of two sets of parents—or two models of marriage—is
a familiar one to many Hera women. In the midst of a less than ideal
family situation that makes other children pessimistic or cynical
about marriage, a young Hera holds to an idealized image of mar-
riage, and seeks it for herself as a way out of a bad family situation.
In happier circumstances, a Hera daughter sees in her parents’ stable
marriage what she wants for herself.
ADOLESCENCE AND EARLY ADULTHOOD
The adolescent Hera is most content if she’s in a steady relation-
ship. She’s the girl who proudly wears her boyfriend’s ring on a
chain around her neck, daydreams about a big wedding, and keeps
trying on his name—writing “Mrs. Bob Smith,” “Mrs. Robert Smith,”
“Mrs. Robert Edwin Smith,” in her notebook.
Having a steady feels crucially important to her. If she attends a
status-conscious, affluent suburban high school, then it matters who
he is—class officer, varsity football player, member of the “in” club.
If she’s in an inner-city school, what
Hera: Goddess of Marriage, Commitment Maker and Wife