home. Hera feels she has obligation to visit her husband’s relatives.
Athena reminds her that she has some unfinished work to do on
funding a proposal. Artemis advocates going to a women’s confer-
ence.
Or a woman’s decision may concern what to do with the second
half of her life. Here, every aspect of the personality, each goddess,
may have a vested interest in the outcome. For example, is this the
time, “now that the children are grown,” to end an unsatisfactory
marriage? Here Demeter may tip the scales. She had allied herself
with Hera to stay in an unhappy situation “because of the children.”
Now will she join forces with Artemis and favor independence?
Or is this the time to go back to school or make a career change,
thus heeding Athena or Artemis?
Or is it finally Demeter or Hera’s turn to be heard? Has the woman
focused all her energies on developing her career or becoming pro-
fessionally proficient, and now at midlife—having arrived either at
her destination or at a plateau—does she now feel an upsurge of
maternal instinct, thanks to Demeter? Or does she know that she is
lonely, look with envy at couples, and want to be married—having,
up to now, refused to heed Hera?
Or is the missing goddess the quietest one of all—is it Hestia’s
turn to come up, as midlife brings with it a need for reflection and
a search for spiritual values?
Midlife may bring a new configuration of goddesses, or the new
prominence of one goddess. This potential shift happens at every
major new stage of life—adolescence, adulthood, retirement, meno-
pause, as well as midlife. When a time of transition comes, if the ego
is in charge of an orderly, reflective, conscious process, then the
woman considers priorities, loyalties, values, and reality factors. She
does not force resolution of conflicting choices; resolution comes
after the issues have become clear. This process may take five
minutes, when she’s deciding what to do on Sunday. Or it may take
five years, when she is contemplating a major life change.
For example, I’ve seen women struggle for years to resolve “the
baby question.” Such a woman wonders what to do with her mater-
nal instinct, what to do with her career. And what should she do if
her husband and she disagree—if one
Goddesses in Everywoman