challenges of any kind that arise between them, from ski racing to
a game of gin rummy, are likely to be taken in deadly earnest.
Men for whom an Artemis is “my kind of woman” are often at-
tracted to her as a twin or kindred spirit—a female counterpart of
themselves. Or they may be attracted to her independent, assertive,
spirit and strength of will, which may be undeveloped in themselves.
Or they may be drawn to her as an image of purity that corresponds
to an ideal in themselves.
The twin motif underlies the most common attraction. Here the
man is drawn to his female counterpart, an equal with whom he
feels natural, someone he can have at his side as he pursues what
challenges him.
The man who sees in Artemis admired qualities that are un-
developed in himself is usually drawn to her strength of will and
independent spirit. He places her on a pedestal for qualities that are
usually thought of as “unfeminine.” She is beautiful to him for her
strengths. His idealized woman resembles Wonder Woman (who
disguised herself as Diana, the Roman name for Artemis).
When my son was eight, I overheard his friend speaking admir-
ingly of a girl’s daring exploits. He saw his girlfriend as outspoken
and brave, a girl who he could count on to come to his rescue: “If
anyone messed with me, I’d call her up and she’d be over in a
minute.” As a psychiatrist, I’ve heard that same tone of admiration,
that same pride in affiliation, when men who have Artemis as an
ideal image speak of the exploits or accomplishments of women
they love.
A third kind of man is drawn to the purity of Artemis, her virginity
and identification with pristine nature. In Greek mythology, this
attraction was personified by Hippolytus, a handsome youth who
dedicated himself to the goddess Artemis and to a life of celibacy.
His chastity offended Aphrodite, Goddess of Love, who then set in
motion a tragic sequence of events—a myth I’ll describe in the
Aphrodite chapter. Such men—attracted to women who seem to be
as pure as Artemis—are offended by earthy sexuality. Like youthful
Hippolytus, they may be in late adolescence or early adulthood, and
may be virgin themselves.
Artemis: Goddess of the Hunt and Moon, Competitor and Sister