Grief and Loss Across the Lifespan, Second Edition

160 Grief and Loss Across the Lifespan

functioning, as well as the capacity for generative experiences and

positive emotions. (Bonanno, 2004, pp. 20–21)

Resilience after death is associated with: the intermittent experience of

positive emotions during the grieving process; active coping and engagement

with matters within their control; connecting with supportive social supports;

making meaning through the process of finding an explanation for the death;

benefit finding at various levels (e.g., spiritual, personal); and the reconstruc-

tion of one’s identity (Neimeyer & Anderson, 2002).

Current research points toward humanity’s inner strength and capacity

for resilience. We can help emerging adults cope with feelings of grief and

enhance their inner strengths and progressive adaptation by using Worden’s

Four Tasks of Grief while integrating and enhancing resilience factors.

A  counselor’s self-awareness, establishment of a solid therapeutic alliance,

and continued assessment of an emerging adult’s grief best facilitates an

accurate conceptualization and corresponding intervention. Many emerging

adults may not be aware of the extensive direct and indirect impact the death

of a loved one can have across time. In a 2001 study of 433 emerging adults

between the ages of 18 and 23, Balk et al. stated that, “Many students do not

see themselves as needing help in dealing with their loss and are thus not

likely to complain to physicians or counselors about grief but instead about

insomnia, lack of motivation, inability to concentrate, and anxiety.” Therefore,

a thorough assessment of an emerging adult’s experience of grief is essential.

A thorough understanding of grief and resilience is essential in order to

avoid under-pathologizing and/or over-pathologizing an emerging adult’s expe-

rience of primary losses and secondary losses, such as financial support, a family

role, desired lifestyle, social changes, envisioned future, and even personal iden-

tity. It is important to recognize when adjunctive support and referrals to com-

munity resources can be beneficial. Finally, a counselor can model a wholesome

goodbye and significantly enhance feelings of a healthy closure that allow for an

emerging adult’s ability to continue moving forward on the path of life.

“Dear Mom,

It’s the day of my graduation and I can see family and friends out in the

crowd, but wish I could see you out there too. I am wearing your ring; it some-

how makes me feel like you are by my side. I feel connected to you whenever

I listen to your favorite song late at night, open my wallet and see your picture

inside, and eat at your favorite restaurant which by the way we are going to

tonight. I also started participating in local 5Ks and run in your honor to raise

money for children grief support groups and camps. Well, I just wanted to let

you know that Dad and I still think about you and miss you tons, but we are

doing okay. I love you mom.” —Marissa, 22 years of age

Emerging Adulthood: Hereditary Breast and Ovarian Cancer

Allison Werner-Lin and Lindsey M. Hoskins

Allison Werner-Lin, PhD, LCSW, is an assistant professor at the School of Social Policy

and Practice at the University of Pennsylvania. Her research addresses the ethical and