The Guardian | 30.04.22 | SATURDAY | 31n o s m a r t p h o n e , i n c r e a s i n g t o 47 % o f o v e r- 6 5 s. T h e m o r e
it becomes an expectation of how we socialise, or how
we get into venues (with Covid passes, or event tickets,
for example), how we bank or pay bills, the bigger the
cost for those unable or unwilling to get one.
Days 10 and 11
Time to speak to the phone addiction expert : Dr Anna
Lembke , who is chief of the Addiction Medicine Dual
Diagnosis Clinic at Stanford University. She tells me that
phone addiction is real – both because of the nature of
the devices and because they are a portal to addictive
pastimes such as pornography or gambling. “ As with
any drug, the vast majority of users won’t get addicted,
but a small subset – 10-15% – will run into trouble and
potentially get seriously addicted,” she says.
What, I ask, are the negative eff ects of such an
addiction? “Less joy in modest pleasures that used to
give us joy,” she says. “Mental preoccupation with the
phone, and heightened distractibility and reactivity.
Decreased ability to be present in the moment.”
I can’t quite separate some of these from the basic
reality of living in 2022 or, if I’m honest, from my own
nature. I do constantly fi nd myself checking my phone
- and more than 10 days in, am still missing it – but
is that down to my phone, or me being someone who
constantly wants to know what’s going on, not just in
the wider world, but in my world? I’m honestly unsure.
I fi nd myself wondering about Lembke’s own phone
u s e. I s s h e a s n e a k y d e v o t e e? “ I a m a n e x t r e m e n o n - u s e r - I keep it turned off and in my bag 90% of the time.”
Lembke has one particularly stark tip for people who
want to change their relationship with their phones:
change your number (if necessary) and then don’t give
it out, and don’t have your phone on when you’re not
using it. She does this herself – eff ectively turning her
phone into a send-only device. “Since my phone doesn’t
receive, I’m not mentally preoccupied with checking
it,” she says. This strikes me as very good advice for
someone, but that someone probably isn’t me. And what
if someone needs to contact her in an emergency?
In the meantime, I have missed about 12 WhatsApp
calls on my laptop from a close friend and neighbour.
The last message from him reads: “Your lack of phone
is getting very annoying for me.”
Days 12 and 13
Lembke’s comments are still troubling me, but also
don’t tally with my personal experience – I am clearly
a very heavy phone user, but I feel far more anxious
and stressed without it than with it. Is it possible to
be a heavy user without being an addict, or it having a
detrimental eff ect on your life?
I t a l k t o n e u r o s c i e n t i s t a n d a u t h o r D e a n B u r n e t t , w h o
starts by agreeing with Lembke. “There are undoubtedly
cases where people become overly reliant on their phones
and experience negative behavioural changes as a result,”
he says. “But these seem to be extreme cases .” The key
point, he adds, is how you feel: is your phone use causing
you distress, or coming at the detriment of the rest of
your life? If not, then you’re not a problem user.
Burnett uses the example of drugs to sketch out what
for him is a crucial distinction: that between addiction
and dependence. “These are neurologically diff erent
things – someone who is in a lot of pain who regularly
takes powerful opiates isn’t necessarily an addict, and
need not become one. If you’re already in a lot of pain,
painkillers are essentially undoing a negative change
- you get dependence, not addiction.”
In my case, Burnett suggests, the right term might
be not addiction, but dependence – for me, my phone
isn’t creating a need, but fulfi lling an existing one. This
I can live with. I really wa nt my phone bac k.
Day 14
With the end in sight, I am practically skipping through
the day. I can see positives I haven’t before. I have only
had to charge my phone three times in a fortnight. It’s
so light and cheap that I can throw it at friends who
have taken the piss out of it.
As the fortnight has progressed, I have largely stopped
texting – cutting myself off f r o m e v e n t h i s p e r m i s s i b l e
means of communication. A two-word reply can feel
like an insult – and explaining why it was brief requires
another. But, elated at the thought that I get my actual
phone back tomorrow, I dash off a T 9 t e x t t o a c o l l e a g u e :
“Sounds good vag.” Turns out no one updated the T9
dictionary to include “tbh” as a conversational tic. Virtual
keyboards didn’t come along a moment too soon.
So what have I learned? That I use my phone too much
and that’s fi ne? Or not fi ne, but I’m too dependent to do
anything about it? Oddly, almost everything I missed
was practical rather than fun: maps, Google, the ability
to quickly check for an email or send a short note. But
I found myself feeling increasingly isolated – and
unusually aware that I live alone (a situation I generally
love). As much of our lives atomise, community comes
to mean something new and more of us work remotely,
what’s wrong with constantly staring at something that
renders distance no object to having a relationship?
My friend Jasper brings me back to earth with
something of a thump. “Is this supposed to be
r e p r e s e n t a t i v e o f w h a t n o r m a l p e o p l e w o u l d g o t h r o u g h
without a phone? Because you’re diff erent, James,”
he says, as I wait for the next sentence. “Not everyone
needs to tweet every fi ve minutes.”
But it turns out I do. And, in a few short hours, I can.
All hail the smartphone •Reset your tech life
By Dr Anna Lembke1 Go on a digital fast:
don’t touch your phone- or any screens – for
24 hours. The aim is to
interrupt your physiology
and reset dopamine
reward pathways.
In truth, 24 hours is
probably not enough , but
it may make you reali se
how addicted you are.
2 Optimi se your chance
of success by setting a
date and time for going
cold turkey. Tell people
you’ll be out of contact
and make plans for what
you’ll do in this time.
Trust me : it will feel very
long. Time slows when we
stop chasing dopamine.
3 Anticipate the
symptoms of
withdrawal : anxiety,
irritability, insomnia,
dysphoria, craving.
Just know these are
time limited and with
continued abstinen ce will
lessen or go away entirely.
4 When you get intense
cravings to check your
phone, take a cold bath,
do 50 push-ups or clean
the closet. In other words,
rather than switch
addictions to something
else that makes you feel
good , invite pain as
a way to reset the balance.
5 When the fast is over,
plan how to re integrate
digital devices without
letting them take over
your life. Write down the
ways your fast made you
fe el better and keep it with
you ; make a list of what
you plan to do and set
a time limit ; use strategies
such as turning off alerts
and deleting apps.