AS INSTAGRAM LIKES to remind us,
everything we want is on the other side of
fear. But uncovering the source of your
trepidation is a more powerful play – and
one that could take you by surprise. Fear
of epic fails and humiliation sit, as you’d
expect, at the top of the list, but rising to the
surface is the fear of triumph.
As psychologist Mary Hoang recently
discovered, you might not even know
you’re carrying this fear. What could be
so scary about getting everything you’ve
ever wanted? It was while setting new
objectives for her business, The Indigo
Project – a psychology practice in Sydney- that Hoang came to experience the
effects first-hand: “I was self-sabotaging,
which had manifested in procrastination.”
She explored her behaviour and
discovered that hiding behind her self-
sabotage was the fear of losing her
identity. “I’d had this idea that if I became
successful, I would become someone I’m
not and people wouldn’t like me.”
Hoang believes a fear of success is
something we should be talking about
more. Despite women only representing
33 per cent of entrepreneurs (as of
Australia’s 2016 census), the number of
female owner-managers is increasing
(7.6 per cent in the past decade), and at
a much quicker rate than males (0.3 per
cent). For this group, the fear of success is
really the fear of the unknown. Unlike
a fear of failure, where you can easily
predict what the outcome would be if youfell short, all kinds of variables exist if you
hit the big S. This is uncharted territory.
Research shows that about 70 per cent
of people feel like a phoney at some point
in their careers, and Hoang says some of
our self-worth vulnerabilities can be
attributed to Australia’s infamous tall
poppy syndrome – where we fear that
others will cut us down for doing something
great for ourselves. “We feel it’s
egotistical. The breeding of this fear is so
unhealthy when good ideas need to be
out there and taking over the world.”
Jane Jackson, a career management
coach, explains that when we deny the
world our best ideas, we also suffer.
“Those who self-sabotage withdraw into
their comfort zone and don’t grow
professionally or personally,” she says.
But like all great success stories, Hoang
has been able to move forward. “It didn’t
feel healthy for me to not want to improve
just because I didn’t want to not feel a part
of the group,” she explains. “That wasn’t
motivating me to be a better person.”
Acknowledging the root of the fear- whether it’s becoming a sell-out or
turning into your parents – and then
addressing it, is what will ultimately prove
to be your most valuable tool.E
74
Words: Samera Kamaleddine; Elle McClure. Photography: Fauve Bowman; Getty ImagesFEAR OF FAILURE
HAS LONG DOMINATED OUR
CAREER CONVERSATIONS,
BUT WHAT IF, IN REALITY,
IT’S THE DREAD OF SUCCESS
THAT’S BRINGING YOUR
GOAL-CHASING
TO A HALT?STRESSED
FOR
SUCCESS
FEAR FACTOR:
ZERO
THE ROAD TO SUCCESS IS
PAVED WITH PITHY PEARLS
OF WISDOM. HERE’S THREE
TO ACTUALLY LIVE BY:
1) PAT YOURSELF ON THE BACK
Every step forward is a positive
step, right? So celebrate small
successes. That way each one gets
easier and easier to accept.
2) KNOW YOUR STRENGTHS
Everyone has them, so
acknowledge yours. Keep thinking
about the legacy you will
leave by using your strengths
to achieve your dream.
3) FOLLOW YOUR VALUES
Staying true to yourself and fulfilling
your values personally and
professionally: that is success.SELF