Forestry Journal – May 2018

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FORESTER’S DIARY


H


E was the greatest and
not slow to tell us so.
But for a fighting man to
avoid military service
sent out mixed messages.
He explained his refusal of army
service in Vietnam by saying, “I
don’t have nothing against the Viet
Cong,” a sentiment I found oddly
logical. If only it were possible to
examine our national or cultural
differences on a personal level,
perhaps life could be simpler –
and the future less depressing.
And today I don’t have nothing
against those Iranians, nor
those North Koreans. Yemenis,
Israelis, Saudis, or Americans;
it is hard for me, as it was for
Muhammad Ali, to imagine I
opposed someone else’s religion
or political philosophy enough
to want to shoot them or blow
them up or, nowadays, to poison
them. Everyone,
regardless of beliefs,
is somebody’s child.
All this philosophy
is brought about
by my recall of an
epic Institute tour
to Russia in the
1980s. President
Gorbachev had
initiated a second
Russian revolution
and doors which
had been sealed for
generations were beginning
to open. The party went
to Moscow, then, very
memorably, to Tbilisi
in Georgia and
finally to Leningrad,
now renamed of
course, but in those
days beginning
to welcome
parties of boozy
Scandinavians.
Everywhere
we came into
contact with
forestry or
forest products
we were warmly
welcomed. Foresters,
especially in our hemisphere,
tend to have the same sort of
management problems, from
sustainability to harvesting and
marketing. Other content of the
tour was perhaps a little odd; for
example, it was hard to see the
relevance of a trip to see Josef
Stalin’s birthplace to our party
and the domestic flights in military
Ilyushin jets were a bit parlous,

but at a human, personal even,
level, all was fun, frolics, conifers
and vodka. Not by any measure a
life-changing experience, our trip
to Russia.
Older readers will no doubt
recall how I got into forestry as a
career so I won’t go there again.
But recent events have rung a
distant bell about the course of my
journey through the profession.
When I came back from Africa,
I applied to the FC for a job.
I was duly appointed District
Officer Grade
2 and posted to
the South Wales
Valleys, at that
time considered
the white man’s
grave. I got time
off from the Neath
District for good
behaviour (just
joking, folks.
Between fires
in the woods
we had a good
time), and was
transferred to East Anglia.
It was about this time
that the Commish was
obsessed with Net
Discounted Revenue.
Every decision was
subjected to the
remorseless
logic of
financial
returns, and
that included
growing oak
in some of our
lowland woods. This
was not going to hit the
jackpot, was it? So, the decision
was made – at the highest level –
to spray young, newly established
oakwoods with 2,4,5-T, in diesel
solvent, would you believe, and to
replant the resulting sterile sites
with Corsican pine. Would you
believe that?
The lads in the woods were
horrified. Having devoted their
time and muscle to getting oaks
to head height they were being
equipped with protective suits

and sprayers and instructed to
destroy their hard-won and much-
cherished oaks. It was about this
time that I decided that I was
the world’s worst civil servant
and legged it for the embryonic
private sector. I didn’t want to be
associated with the destruction
of young oak; this undoubtedly
coloured my judgement.
Anyway, I spray my paths and
patios with glyphosate these days,
but I don’t feel happy doing it.
I feel a kind of revulsion about
attacking my weeds with chemical
poisons, so you can imagine how
I feel about Salisbury and all
that. Yesterday I pumped up the
sprayer, set to work, and found
myself visibly shaken by the

arrival of two low-flying Tornado
jet fighters. Was I about to be
bombed? Would my geese be hit
by missiles? Well, no. It was just
the RAF practising, as they used to
in the good old Cold War days.
Now here’s an idea for you.
Why doesn’t the Institute, or the
RFS or Woodland Heritage, seek
now, through the depleted Russian
Embassy, to arrange another
foresters’ tour to Russia? We could
follow this up with a trip to the
beechwoods of the Caspian or to
the bare hills of North Korea.
I ain’t got nothing against
foresters, the world over. In the
words of the song...”All we need is
love, love...”
Tanarus

Let’s go on a


road trip


“I WISH PEOPLE


WOULD LOVE
EVERYBODY ELSE

THE WAY THEY LOVE
ME. IT WOULD BE

A BETTER WORLD.”


MUHAMMED ALI

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