MONDAY, MAY 23 , 2022. THE WASHINGTON POST EZ RE C3
going to be kids for whom this one
week gets them through the rest of
the year.”
“The real magic of this camp,”
he continued, “is that every single
staff member is trans and queer. It
will give the kids hope for what a
happy, healthy, normal, thriving
future can be.”
Although many traditional
summer camps have made efforts
to adjust programming to be more
gender-neutral and inclusive,
“even when a camp has the best
intentions,” Berkowitz said, “if
there isn’t a genuine understand-
ing of how to make binary gender
not such a part of the culture, then
kids are still going to feel differ-
ent.”
“It’s just easier to start from the
ground up and build something
inclusive from the beginning,”
they added.
Nick Teich had the same goal
when he founded Camp Aranu’tiq,
an overnight program for trans-
gender and nonbinary youths in
New Hampshire, in 2009.
Like Berkowitz, Teich — who
transitioned in 2007 — was not
asked back to the camp where he
was volunteering as a counselor.
“The reason was because of my
transition,” said Teich, who was
24 at the time.
The experience propelled him
to start a summer camp specifical-
ly for trans kids. Camp Aranu’tiq
serves 440 overnight campers.
“The helpful thing is you’re able
to be around people who really
understand you,” Teich said. “It’s
very powerful. There’s an instant
connection.”
That’s exactly what Berkowitz,
Bogard and Grabel had in mind
with their camp.
“Indigo Point is a place where
kids can just be their authentic
selves,” Bogard said. “They are
there to flourish.”‘It was the most fun I’d had
in a long time’
Amari Callaway, 26, Philadel-
phia
I co-hosted a queer prom last
summer through my queer skate
crew Rolling with the Homos. We
did some fundraising and were
able to put on a super fun
evening for our community! The
first half of the evening was a
sort of “cocktail hour” held at a
brewery one of our members
co-owns, with music, mingling
and a photo booth setup.
The second half took place at a
local roller rink, where we skated
and danced in our prom finery. It
was the most fun I’d had in a long
time, especially with the pan-
demic, and it was a wonderful
makeup prom experience for a
lot of our members, who either
didn’t attend their proms or
weren’t living as their most au-
thentic selves when they origi-
nally attended prom.‘We were able to provide
a space where people knew
they wouldn’t be judged’
Prachi Misra, 20, Tampa
This past academic year, I
joined the Planned Parenthood
Generation Action at the Univer-
sity of South Florida’s E-Board as
event coordinator, and the or-
ganization was hosting its first
queer prom in April. With this
event, we provided a space where
people knew they wouldn’t be
judged for coming as themselves
and bringing who they wanted.
In creating this safe space, we
affirmed an aspect of their iden-
tity that traditional high school
proms overlook and sometimes
even dismiss. As a queer person
of color, I found it healing to hear
conversations around me (“I’ve
never met another queer Indian
before”) and to create a space
where people who felt invisible
were able to find others like
themselves and know that they
have a support system — even if
they didn’t grow up with one.‘Being out and proud is an
achievement in my eyes’
Hayley Ianna, 23, Pittsburg, Kan.
My time at Pride prom was
one I will never forget. I have
always dreamed of going to a
prom like the ones I’d watch in
the films back in Australia. When
I moved to the United States to
undertake my master’s degree,
my wife and I were thrilled that
my school and town put on a
prom dedicated to our communi-
ty. I was a closeted lesbian back
in Australia, and being out and
proud is an achievement in my
eyes. It is so important to be able
to be who you are on a night you
are supposed to remember and
have dreamed about forever.
I hear stories about trans
youth or young LGBTQIA+ peo-
ple not being allowed to attend
their schools’ proms and are then
left with a sour taste in their
mouth about prom. The Pride
prom that was put on by Q Space
Pitt and Pittsburg State GSA
helps remove the sour taste
many my age may have. It also
gave people like me, who realized
who they were and became
proud after high school, a chance
to relive a moment of youth we
never believed we’d get back.go to support a close friend
who helped plan the event. I
also went because my high
school prom was terrible and
was less inclusive for queer
people.
One of the biggest highlights
of my night at queer prom was
walking into the venue and
feeling welcome by seeing dif-
ferent queer people who attend-
ed my school. Later that night, I
was crowned royal monarch,
which intentionally breaks from
traditional gender-specific ti-
tles such as “homecoming
queen” or “prom king.” Winning
prom royalty felt like a scene in
a movie.‘It is always beautiful to see
so many people living their
truth’
Liz Osowiecki, 27, Long Island
When my friends and I were
all in high school, we either
weren’t comfortable being who
we are or it wasn’t safe to be who
we are. The idea of going to
prom with someone outside of
the “norm” wasn’t even a realis-
tic idea. When we heard our
friends were having a queer
prom, we were so excited, be-
cause now we have real pride in
who we are and couldn’t wait to
celebrate. It is always beautiful
to see so many people living
their truth.‘I felt so rewarded in going to
a formal event where I felt
assured in my gender’
Samantha Ann Burnside, 30,
Webb City, Mo.
I chose to go to the Pride prom
because a lot of my friends were
going. I love any excuse to get
dressed up, and I had just the
dress for the occasion: a prom
dress from the late ’70s that I
restored myself!
I mostly enjoyed seeing every-
one dressed up so beautifully,
wearing clothes and styles they
may not have been able to wear
to their high school proms. We
all live in small towns, and most
of us didn’t have the agency to be
ourselves during our public-
schooling days.
The attendees were a di-
verse crowd of lovely people,
including lesbian couples, gay
couples, nonbinary guests and
people who are trans. Almost
every representation of the
LGBTQIA+ alphabet was in at-
tendance, which wasn’t too
shabby for a Pride prom in
small-town Kansas!
I was apprehensive about
going to the prom at first
because of nerves. But in the
end, it was a wonderful time,
and I felt so rewarded in going
to a formal event where I felt
assured in my gender. Those
opportunities don’t come up
often enough!“I wanted to know I could
walk in that room and see ...
individuals having a good time
dancing with each other and
not being gawked at or made to
feel awkward,” Dengler said of
her experience at queer prom.
“And it was so nice to see that.
It was so nice to be a part of
that.”
With prom season underway
across the country, other groups
like QFX have been hosting for-
mal events such as queer proms
to break from the heteronorma-
tive traditions that have made
school dances a fraught experi-
ence for some.
Many in the LGBTQ communi-
ty say these events offer them a
safe and inclusive space to be
themselves. We asked a few of
them to share their experiences
and photos of their nights.
Responses have been edited for
length and clarity.
‘It was the prom I wish
my younger self had’
Molly Hottle, 33, Seattle
Last June, I went to Skate
Prom, a collaboration between
Roll Around Seatown and CIB
Seattle. It was designed to just
give us all a reason to dress up
and skate. But it was also a place
for those of us who didn’t
always feel welcome or at home
at our traditional high school
proms to celebrate, skate and
get fancy!
When I went to prom in high
school, it was all very tradition-
al. I went with a male date and
wore the big dress. All of that
was fine, but looking back, I
know I was trying to fit into a
box. The box was like this cliche
of what prom is supposed to
look like in the catalogues and
movies.
As an adult, I was able to
attend this prom and be myself.
Two of my friends and I asked
each other as platonic dates, and
we made each other corsages. I
wore what I wanted, including
my roller skates, and put on a ton
of glitter and extravagant make-
up. I wasn’t worried about what
others thought of me or fitting
into that box.
We skated in circles, held
hands and did tricks at the skate
park, all in the company of other
queer people. It was the prom I
wish my younger self had. It was
the prom I wish every young
queer person out there could
have.
‘Winning prom royalty felt
like a scene in a movie’
Simon Graves, 19, Norfolk
The queer prom I attended
was hosted by different organi-
zations at my school, Old Do-
minion University. I chose to
PROM FROM C1
Queer proms:
What ‘I wish my
younger self had’
Berkowitz is organizing the
camp with Dan Grabel, director
and owner of Camp Manitowa in
Benton, Ill., who had the idea to
host a program for LGBTQ chil-
dren on his property after seeing a
need for the program. Also in-
volved is Daniel Bogard, a St. Louis
rabbi and advocate.
“We were hopeful that we were
going to get 20 kids,” Bogard said.
But as registrations poured in, he
quickly realized “there is such a
demand.”
“How much this has really tak-
en off put into sharp focus the
need for this type of program,”
Grabel said. “We’re counting down
the days.”
Activities will be similar to
those at traditional overnight
camps, including swimming, kay-
aking, tree climbing, zip-lining,
horseback riding, archery, land
sports, and arts and crafts.
Roy Mills, who lives in Denver,
was one of the first parents to sign
his child up for Camp Indigo Point.
“I thought it was pretty amaz-
ing that they saw the need, and
they went for it,” said Mills, whose
13-year-old son is gay. “I think
they’re doing a major service for
kids that are unable to really find a
community.”
When he told his son about
Camp Indigo Point, “he was just so
excited,” Mills said, adding that
Cypress knew it would be “a place
where he belonged.”
The week-long session is priced
at $575, and full scholarships are
available.
Several community leaders,
rabbis and local families havesexuality, and Berkowitz believes
the controversy led the camp to
ask them not to return the follow-
ing summer.
While the incident was pro-
foundly upsetting, Berkowitz,
having grown up attending and
appreciating Jewish summer
camps, decided to give camp an-
other go.
They went on to work at an-
other Jewish overnight program
in Rocky Mount, Mo. Berkowitz
described the camp as “a very ac-
cepting place to be, but it was also
very isolating to be one of the only
queer people at camp.”
So, along with a few others,
Berkowitz has created a nonde-
nominational camp that directly
caters to LGBTQ campers and
staff.
At the time, “we had no idea the
real need that was out there for
this camp,” Berkowitz said of
Camp Indigo Point, a one-week
program for LGBTQ children and
counselors. The inaugural session
will start June 12.
Because there are other camps
specifically for LGBTQ children,
Berkowitz wasn’t sure how many
sign-ups they’d get for Camp Indi-
go Point. In any case, they said,
they would have been thrilled with
even a handful.
In a matter of weeks, though, all
95 spots filled up with campers in
grades two to 11, hailing from more
than 25 states — including Alaska.
The 29 staff roles have also been
filled, and there are about 55 pro-
spective campers on a wait list.
CAMP FROM C1
A camp that caters to
LGBTQ children, staff
in bills targeting protections for
LGBTQ children and their fami-
lies.
Bogard said the recent spate of
anti-LGBTQ bills is “exactly what
has motivated me” to create Camp
Indigo Point.
Berkowitz, who is the senior
director of public policy and advo-
cacy at Promo, a Missouri-based
LGBTQ advocacy group, was driv-
en by the same cause. They refer-
enced a measure in Florida that
aims to limit LGBTQ discussion in
schools — critics call it the “don’t
say gay” bill — and proposals in
Missouri to restrict transgender
students from playing on sports
teams that correspond with their
gender identity.
“This camp is literally going to
save lives,” Bogard said. “There areto camp together as children and
now do advocacy work together.)
Berkowitz was on board right
away.
Seeing anti-trans legislation
across the country “is terrifying”
as the parent of a trans child, said
Bogard, a rabbi at Central Reform
Congregation who also is an
LGBTQ activist and has testified
at the Missouri Capitol against
anti-trans bills.
“These kids are so beat down by
their world, and we have to give
them a place where they can have
hope,” Bogard said. “This is going
to be a place of healing. I think it
has to be.”
As the U.S. adult population has
reached a record 7.1 percent who
identify as LGBTQ, there has si-
multaneously been a dramatic risemade donations to the program,
and they have so far given out
$12,000 in scholarships.
“We have an underlying philos-
ophy that we’re never going to
turn a kid away because of their
financial situation,” Grabel said.
Grabel, who has spent more
than two decades running sum-
mer camp programs, said he has
repeatedly heard from parents of
LGBTQ children who didn’t feel
welcome at traditional overnight
camps. He and his business part-
ner, Andy Brown, wanted to run a
program specifically for LGBTQ
youths, and they needed to find a
strong leadership team.
They joined forces with Bogard,
the rabbi, whose 8-year-old son is
transgender. Bogard pitched the
idea to Berkowitz. (The two wentCOURTESY OF DANIEL BOGARD
Daniel Bogard, far left, and Shira Berkowitz, bottom right, during a lobbying trip i n D.C. in 2018.HAYLEY IANNA/WASHINGTON POST ILLUSTRATION; JAEDE SHEPPARD/WASHINGTON POST ILLUSTRATION
TOP: Hayley Ianna, right, with her wife at Pride prom in Pittsburg, Kan.,
on April 23. A BOVE: Simon Graves on the night of queer prom
at Old Dominion University in Norfolk in May.