MENTORS MAGAZINE | EDITION 2 | 43
- Stories We Tell Others About
Ourselves
Whether you are a leader joining a new
team, or a job candidate in the first round of
interviews, or someone meeting a potential
new client for the first time, the stories you
tell about yourself often set the tone for
how the relationship will unfold, if it does,
that is. Which are the right stories in such
scenarios? It’s hard to go wrong with stories
that illustrate your humility, good judgment,
integrity, and expertise and experience. As
for what to emphasize, putting yourself firm-
ly into the shoes of your
audience should provide
clues. The needs and ex-
pectations of the people in
your audience will, of
course, vary, depending on
the context of the meeting
and their future goals as
they involve you.
For instance, if you are the
new boss meeting the
members of your team for
the first time, you know
they’ll wonder about your
leadership style and how
you’ll treat them. Acknowledge this and
share a personal story or two that show you
empathize—maybe from when you met your
boss for the first time. Mention the lessons
you’ve learned in managing others and make
sure to highlight any mistakes from which
you’ve grown. Share examples of how
you’ve navigated new cultures in the past—
organizational or regional—and what you’re
hoping to learn in this next stage with their
help. This shows humility, humanizes you,
and reduces the power distance that can
hamper the open and honest dialogue that
builds trust.If your audience—whether a group or an in-
dividual—is looking to engage you for your
expertise, share stories that illustrate how
you’ve delivered results or solved similar
problems for others. Mention the challenges
you encountered along the way and how
you met them successfully—even if it took a
few attempts to get it right. This is also an
elegant way to share your
strengths without bragging
about your accomplish-
ments.When others want to get to
know us, they aren’t just
looking for the content on
our LinkedIn profile. They
want to know the real us to
determine whether we’re
trustworthy and whether
associating with us will be
of positive or negative val-
ue to them. That’s why re-
cruiters and hiring managers no longer have
qualms about digging into our social media
pro les and online musings to evaluate our
reputation and our judgment.“And judgment is key
whenever we share
personal information.
Faulty judgment can
result in some awk-
ward moments if not
lasting reputational
harm.”