COSMOPOLITAN July 2015 145
Q. My boyfriend’s dad
makes a lot of really racist
comments. It makes me
uncomfortable, but I usually
laugh it o because I don’t
know how to handle it. My
boyfriend just ignores it.
How do I deal?A. Being on your boyfriend’s
home turf is tricky – but
silence is really acceptance,
and laughing along comes
dangerously close to being
endorsement. Start off byexplaining to your boyfriend
that it bothers you, and ask
him to say something to his
pops. If he doesn’t want to
step up, do it yourself. Keep
it brief – “I can’t say I agree
with you, Mr Dad, and I’d
rather not talk about that
stuff” then flip the script to
a more neutral convo – “but
I do want to hear about your
golf trip.” Then you can agree
to disagree and hopefully
avoid more awkward convos
in the future. #A. Don’t try to hide the party or your anxiety about it.
Just be honest and get a grip of the problem. Explain
to him that it feels like a little bit too much too soon
to introduce him to everyone in your life. He should get
it, because it’s a pretty common-sense reaction. He
might even feel the same way. Instead, tell him you’d
rather celebrate your birthday with him, one-on-one- he should RSVP to that party, stat.
Q. I JUST STARTED SEEING A GUY, AND MY BIRTHDAY
PARTY IS COMING UP. INVITING HIM MEANS HE’LL
PREMATURELY MEET MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY.
BUT NOT INVITING HIM SEEMS RUDE. HELP!No I don’t want you to
meet my family... but
here are some balloons!GETTY IMAGES