WORDS BY EMMA MARKEZIC. STILL-LIFE PHOTOGRAPHYBY PABLO MARTIN/BAUER. GETTY IMAGES- A WILL
We’re not talking about the
will to refrain from eating
three Krispy Kremes in a row
- we mean a legal will. You
may think because you don’t
have a sprawling estate you
don’t need one. But by now
your financial folio will likely
include such fun things as
HECS debt (ugh) and super
accounts and these are up
to you to handle yourself,
#bosslady style.
- AN OPINION ON WHO
YOU WANT TO VOTE FOR
Going to an election booth
only because you have to and
randomly ticking boxes just
doesn’t cut it. You should have
a grasp of what the major
parties stand for and which
one f loats your boat. - A DOCTOR
Not a place where you see a
different doctor every time in
some kind of medical merry-
go-round – we mean a doc
who knows your name. And
who might one day know your
children’s names. - A SEX TOY
One that you’re really quite
fond of. Seriously. We really
hope you have one of these
in your life by now. - A LAPTOP
No, your phone isn’t a tiny
computer. You need a real
one, with a keyboard. - DECENT
UNDERWEAR
READ: THROW OUT
ANYTHING THAT
FEATURES HOLES
OR DISNEY
CHARACTERS AND
REPLACE WITH
ANYTHING
FABRICATED FROM
HIGH-QUALITY
COTTON OR LACE.
ALSO, BY NOW
YOU SHOULD
PROBABLY HAVE
A T-SHIRT BRA,
STRAPLESS BRA,
PLUNGE BRA AND
SEXY-TIMES BRA. - AN ACTUAL FILING
SYSTEM
This does not include a shoe
box under your bed. It does
include an excel spreadsheet
and probably an accountant. - A LINKEDIN
PROFILE
Even if you’re still studying
or working part-time at a bar,
you want to keep your online
presence as shiny as possible.
LinkedIn isn’t just an online
résumé, it’s a career and a
networking wish list waiting
to happen. Don’t be afraid to
add people you’d love to end
up working with one day. - A KNOWLEDGE THAT
YOU CAN’T CHANGE THE
LENGTH OF YOUR LEGS,
WIDTH OF YOUR HIPS OR
THE SHAPE OF YOUR FEET
Hence you have long stopped
complaining about such minor
things and are by proxy a
much more pleasant person
to be around. - A SAVINGS
ACCOUNT
Not to be confused with #8,
your emergency fund. This
is for holidays and general
happiness induction. In fact,
when you go to name it, call
it “The H Fund” as a reminder
- and don’t feel guilty about
dipping into it every so often.
- A GO-TO LIP COLOUR...
HANDY FOR EVERYTHING FROM IMPROMPTU MEETINGS TO RUNNING
INTO FORMER FLAMES. BY NOW YOU’VE HAD ENOUGH TIME TO SAMPLE
A GOOD WHACK OF BRANDS AND COLOURS AND KNOW WHICH ONE TAKES
YOU STRAIGHT FROM, “YOU LOOK A LITTLE TIRED” TO,“DID YOU JUST
GET BACK FROM HOLIDAYS?!” - A FRIEND WHO MAKES
YOU LAUGH SO MUCH
SOMETIMES A LITTLE BIT
OF PEE COMES OUT
Because that friend will be
a riot in the nursing home. - A BUSINESS
CARD
Even if you’re a slashie, a
student, or your company’s
stationery budget simply
doesn’t stretch far enough
to get you one, it’s worth
whipping one up. Online
printing juggernauts like
Zazzle or Vistaprint have
ready-made templates that
you can plug your details
into and have delivered
straight to your door. You’ll
be amazed how often they
come in handy. - A PIECE OF
FURNITURE THAT
DOESN’T NEED AN ALLEN
KEY TO PUT TOGETHER
An amazing armchair, a
vintage sideboard – something
that you’re proud to show off
when people come over (and
won’t break if you bump it). - THE
FOLLOWING
WA R D R O B E
ITEMS...
Let’s go top
down, shall we.
A classic trench,
a crisp white
shirt, an LBD,
a good watch
and a pair of
well-fitting jeans.
Wear all at once
to be mistaken
for Audrey
Hepburn. Or
Kate Middleton.
Or possibly Kate
Upton... at least
when she’s at the
airport. #
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