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fi ve hot questions
When people say that
they don’t have time
to meditate, I ask them, ‘Do
you have time to feel like
shit?’” So says meditation
guru Gabrielle Bernstein at
our first meeting, and I have
to admit she has a point.
The ancient practice is
suddenly trending, with a
new study practically every
week touting its many pros.
The cons are ... none. So I’d
added it to my to-do list. The
problem: I never did it. There
were runs to run, memos to
prepare. Even if I could find
the time to sit in silence, how
could I stop thoughts about
everything I should be doing?
Experts will tell you that
there is no wrong way to
meditate. Yet my first attempt
was a f lop. I left feeling no
less stressed. This brought2
DANIELLE MCNALLY RAN FOUR MARATHONS, NO PROBLEM.
IT WAS MEDITATION THAT NEARLY KILLED HERme to Bernstein, the author
of Miracles Now. “I’m trying
to meditate, and I’m mad at
myself that I can’t,” I tell her.
“It’s like I’m trying to win at
meditation.” She assures me
that she hears this from her
clients a lot and adds that
trying to meditate for 45
minutes the first time out is
like starting an exercise plan
with a triathlon. In fact, less
than five minutes is enough.
Bernstein then teaches
me a beginners’ kundalini
meditation: I take long, deep
breaths for three minutes
while repeating the mantra
sat nam (“truth identified”).
Then simply sit quietly for a
minute. Afterwards, I feel
both energised and relaxed.
Then Bernstein gives me a
directive to meditate daily.
Bubble = burst.Wonder drug or no,
meditating is hard. So I pick
up a few more tools. I get the
app OMG. I Can Meditate!. I
also happen upon a YouTube
video called F*ck That! A
Guided Meditation. It has
Enya-like music and expletive-
laced instructions (“You’re
here now, in this place with
your inner stillness. Those
bitches can’t get under your
skin. They can’t even”). After
I stop laughing, it’s useful.
I start meditating more
and more, if not every day. I
repeat my mantra often. And
the more I do it, the less my
mind wanders. I pick out a
zebra-striped silk jumpsuit
because the harem pants will
be perfect for sitting cross-
legged in. I receive multiple
compliments. Meditation
does have its benefits.CAN A TYPE-A GIRL
EVER FIND HER CALM?
AND FIVE
MORE TO
BINGE ON
DIGIDAY
If you’re a fan of the media
and digitisation, this is a
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clued up real good.THE OSHER GÜNSBERG
PODCAST
The Man Formally Known
As Andrew G chats with
interesting celebs... and
some equally interesting
people you’ve never heard
of before right now.THIS AMERICAN LIFE
The parent of Serial, this
explores a dif erent theme
each week with Midsomer
Murders-esque music and
Ira Glass. Which is all you
need, really.STUFF YOU SHOULD
KNOW
Explains things like how
Anonymous works. And
why the f*ck we have
dif erent blood types. You
know, brain ticklers.SERIAL
S1 followed jailed teen
Adnan Syad. S2 is all about
’napped US soldier Bowe
Bergdahl. It’s criminally
juicy, yo.