2013
marieclaire.com.au 63“My body told me that
enough was enough,
and I had a meltdown”
CAMILLA FRANKS, DESIGNER
Being struck by a shocking and very visible nervous
system disorder while in India forced the fashion
designer, now 40, to face demons she’d buried
for years. The subsequent emotional and spiritual
journey was brutal, but it was one she had to have.I
t began with headaches. Then one day, all of a
sudden I turned around and the whole left side of
my face dropped. My team raced me to hospital.
They didn’t know if I’d had a stroke or a brain
tumour or what. I was absolutely terrified. It was Bell’s
palsy, which is an attack on the nervous system. I had
spent so many years running around a hundred miles
an hour like a racehorse and I finally had a meltdown.
“My body was telling me in the most magnificent
and grandiose way that enough was enough.
“I was forced to stand still. And all of a sudden
these other feelings started coming up. My brother died
in a shocking accident when he was 14 and I was 17.
In our society we’re not taught to feel our feelings and
really work through them and so when I finally stood
still and was forced to take a deep breath I discovered I
was struggling with depression and anxiety. I’d
suppressed it for so long and I suddenly realised I was
human, goddamn it.
“When I got home to Australia I hit rock bottom. My
face was shocked for six months and I felt so shy and
self-conscious about it. But the Bell’s palsy wasn’t the
hardest part. I felt so confused by these emotions and I
felt shame and guilt for having them. I had no
understanding of what I was feeling and why.
“It was like a big wave in front of me and I guess I
couldn’t ignore it any more. I made some really hard
decisions. I removed the bad energy from my life. I broke
off relationships. I dived deep into the world of yoga and
meditation and took a big step back from the business
for a while to spend time on me and on self-love.
“I learnt to surround myself with my tribe; people
who celebrate, support, nurture and unconditionally
love me. My relationships have become so much more
authentic and beautiful and real.
“To people who find themselves in that place I’d say
to them you’re not just this crazy person. The journey
isn’t easy and I don’t want to pretend it is. But do
the work on the mind and the body and there will be
light at the end of the tunnel.”everyone said, ‘Once you get that baby
in your arms you’ll never want to leave
it!’ I was the opposite. I’d lost myself.
“When I got the job at Sunrise, one
of the first stories we did was
interviewing a baby whisperer called
Sheyne Rowley. Our switchboard went
into meltdown with mums and dads
whose babies didn’t sleep. And I
thought, ‘There are other people living
my horrible first year as well!’ I felt
terrible for them but I didn’t have^
to feel so guilty.
“It’s so sad my dad never met my
son, who’s now 15, or my other son,
Hunter, who’s 11. You grieve for all those
years they could have had with their
granddad. He also would have loved to
have seen everything I’ve achieved. So
much of my identity now is being on
Sunrise and he never saw that because I
hadn’t started on the show when he
died. He would have been so proud.
“You like to think they’re looking
down on you, and they’re looking after
you and your kids. And I feel I can’t
complain because I have so many
wonderful things in my life.
“But I lost someone I loved and it
still hurts so much.”
Above: Camilla
Franks was
forced to focus
on her health
and wellbeing
following a
crippling illness.First person