82 marieclaire.com.auCHINA
In a country where
homosexuality was illegal
just 20 years ago, gay men
and women have found a
unique way to stay in the
closet: fake marriages.
Out of an estimated
20 million gay men in the
country, as many as 80 per
cent are in fake marriages.
Most gay men marry
straight women, but a new
option is gaining popularity.
Instead of finding a straight
spouse, lesbian women
and gay men are marrying
each other.
Supporters of what are
referred to as “cooperative
marriages” say this option
avoids putting straight
people into potentially
painful situations, and
allows gay people more
freedom. The earliest
known Chinese personals
ad from a gay man seeking
a lesbian wife appeared in a
newsletter in 1995. Today,
the internet helps the
LGBT community form
cooperative partnerships.THE MARRIAGE PLOT
China’s LGBT communities are turning to fake
weddings in order to protect their sexualitiesBEHIND THE
FACADE
Below:
protesters at an
LGBT parade in
Hong Kong in- Elsie Liao
and Mayu Yu
were turned
away from the
registry office in
Beijing in 2013.
MC FACT Only 21% of China believed in accepting homosexuality, according to a Pew Research Center study.*
One such forum is
run by Xiao Xiong, a lanky
self-described tomboy from
Dongbei in north-east
China. Xiao, who organises
a support group for LGBT
people in her area at
discreet locations, like
suburban McDonald’s
restaurants, “knew all her
life” that she only liked
women, but still assumed
that someday she would
marry a man.
“When I turned 25,
eight years ago, my parents
started to really pressure
me to get married. So I
looked on the internet for
help. My search for ‘lesbianneeds fake husband’ was
how I ended up finding
both my fake gay husband
and my real girlfriend,” says
Xiao with a grin.
“I was so relieved that
there was a way to please
my parents without getting
trapped in a marriage with
some poor straight man.”
But it wasn’t easy to
find the right fake husband.
Xiao spoke to men who
wanted her to grow out her
buzz cut or move to a
different city to live in the
same house as her fake
in-laws. So she decided to
start her own forum to help
herself and others look for
suitable partners.
On her site participants
describe their expectations
and needs. It also provides
anonymous chat functions
to explore possibilities
before arranging to meet
a potential fake spouse in
person. The forum has led
to at least 60 matches in
the eight years it’s been
running – and inspiredsimilar sites in cities like
Shanghai and Guangzhou.
Xiao found her
“husband”, a high-school
maths teacher 10 years her
senior. They married in the
autumn of 2012, and have
become good friends. They
live separately, with Xiao
sharing a home with her
girlfriend Jing Jing, a
medical practitioner who
has her own fake
gay husband.
Their story is typical- surveys show most
cooperative marriage
Most cooperative
marriage
partners do not
live with each
@E96C2ñ6CE96
weddingFACTWorld wrap