Reader's Digest

July• 2018 | 119

READER’S DIGEST

Shepouredasmallamountofapple

juice in a paper cup and I drank it

forcingmyselftoconcentrateoneach

stage of swallowing.

he therapist smiled. “You’ve done

well.You’vepassedthetest.Forthe

first few weeks your food will be

mincedorpureed.Butyoumusteat

and drink slowly and carefully. his

is only one of the many things you’re

goingtohavetorelearnhowtodo.”

Relearn. hat word would become

a mantra of my therapist communi–

ty. I was about to learn that restoring

what has been damaged is a very

complicated process.

“Will I Recover?”

Myirstnightintherehabwardwas

terrifying. Alone with my thoughts

InolongerfeltlikeIbelongedtothe

human race. My brain kept taking

toursintomydistantpast.Idrifted

in and out of sleep and throughout

the night I wept.

YetmemoriesIwasconvinced

were the one touchstone I shared

quietly entered the room. She car-
ried a notebook and pen and a bag
that contained saltine crackers some
apple sauce and a box of juice. The
Swallow Lady. “Are you ready for the
tests?” she asked. “They are really
quite simple.”
“Yes” I said ready to show her I
could swallow.
She leaned over the bed and placed
her ingers gently on my throat. “Try
swallowing for me.”
What could be easier? But my
mouth was dry and my throat con-
stricted. I couldn’t swallow. The
harder I tried the more my throat
tightened up.
“Relax” she said. “Try moistening
your mouth.”
I managed to work up some saliva.
Then my chin pushed forward my
neck stretched and I swallowed.
“Good” she said. “Well done.
Everything appears to be working
properly.” She scribbled in her note-
book then passed a cracker to my
good hand. “Now try eating this
cracker but do it slowly in little
pieces.”
Immediately I took a good-sized
bite. he cracker stuck to the roof of
my mouth. I couldn’t chew and only
managed to spit it out.
“Nibble” she said. “Tiny bits.”
I felt like a fool. How could I not
swallow? But I did as she suggested
taking a tiny bit of cracker and then
swallowed.
“Good now try this. Sip slowly.”

ALONE WITH MY

THOUGHTSIWAS

TERRIFIED. I DRIFTED

IN AND OUT OF SLEEP

AND THROUGHOUT

THE NIGHT I WEPT