Reader's Digest

July• 2018 | 65

thefriendreplied.“I’vebeaten him

three games out of ive.”

Source: unijokes.com

THESINGLELIFE

I’vebeensingleforsuchalong

time now that when somebody

asks“Whoareyouwith?”Ijust

automatically reply “Vodafone.”

COMEDIAN MIRANDA HART

MOPPING UP

Igotintoaightonetimewitha

reallybigguyandhesaid“I’mgoing

to mop the loor with your face.”

Isaid“You’llbesorry.”

Hesaid“Ohyeah?Why?”

Isaid“Wellyouwon’tbeableto

get into the corners very well.”

Seen online

MUSICTOYOUREARS

LastnightIwenttoakaraokebarthat

didn’t play any 1970s music. At irst

I was afraid.OhIwaspetriied.

COMEDIAN STEWART FRANCIS

“Wrong court M’lud.”
CARTOON: STEVE JONES

Q:Why did

the cat fall

into the well?

A:It couldn’t

see that well.

Source: reddit.com

ALESSONLEARNT!

Abankrobberpullsoutagun

pointsitatthebanktellerandsays

“Givemeallthemoneyoryou’re

geography!”

he puzzled teller replies

“Don’t you mean history?”

he robber says

“Don’t change the subject!”

Seen at facebook.com

BAD FOR BUSINESS

If she sells seashells by the seashore

thenIthinksheneeds a better

business model.

COMEDIAN HARRISON SLATER

GONE MISSING!

here was a story in the newspapers

recently about a family who left

their three year old in a corn maze

overnightbyaccident.

LikeallparentswheneverI

hearthesekindsofthingsitalways

give me... ideas. Seen online

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