special report
on them by society and themselves,
and alcohol is actually an escape from
that for a lot of people; a way to
relax and get away from very rigid
ideas of how we should and shouldn’t
behave,” she says. “But drinking to
escape made it harder for me to live
up to those standards. If I still drank,
I wouldn’t have had this much self-
confidence or the energy to launch
a business, write a book and put
work out that I feel truly proud of.”
Fact: a 2010 study in the Journal
of Counseling Psychology found
maladaptive perfectionists – people
who strive to reach unattainable
goals and condemn themselves for
failing – reported higher levels of
stress and drinking than adaptive
perfectionists (those who don’t beat
themselves up when things don’t go
to plan) and non-perfectionists. We
drink because we feel like failures,
even though OTT drinking threatens
success. So it’s not surprising that
alcohol can also prove a heady
mixer in the cocktail of anxiety.
Many women drink to numb social
stress, only for that worry, self-
consciousness and self-criticism to
roar up tenfold the morning after.Is it for you?
Thinking of joining the movement?
There are a couple of pieces of
advice, says Warrington. “One is
to meet people in situations where
you wouldn’t necessarily be drinking
(I switched a lot of socialising to
Sunday brunches), but also don’t
make a big deal of it. Remember
it’s your choice and it’s not about
judging anyone else. Everyone has a
different path. You might experience
alcohol as a source of unhappiness
but your friend might not.”
The choice isn’t between total
sobriety or total saturation. Being
sober curious isn’t admitting to a
drinking problem, and drinking less
isn’t a criticism of those who drink
more. It’s simply a personal decision- and one that we are finally free to
make away from the furtive stomach
glances of those around us. WH
Dry socialising
New trend alert! You don’t have to drop nights out
along with the booze. Try these ideas for vino-free funFLOW AFTER DARK
NIGHTCLUB SPIN
at Flow Athletic, Sydney.
flowathletic.com.au
DJs, 3am lighting
and serious smoke
machine action- everything
you’d find at a
nightclub. Minus
the drinking. Oh,
and you’re doing a
spin class. But your
adrenaline will be
pumping as hard
as in those good
old party days.
BLOW DRY BAR
Sydney, Melbourne
and Brisbane
blowdrybar.com.au
OK, it’s not your
average bar and
there’s unlikely to
be any hot blokes
there, but it’s an
ideal spot for
catching up with
girlfriends while
getting a 50-buck
blowdry. Sleek.TEA BARS
Coffee joints are a
dime a dozen but
a tea bar? That’s a
reason for a date.
Check out T Totaler
(ttotalertea.com) or
The Rabbit Hole in
Sydney (therabbit
hole.com.au),
Porcelain Tea
Bar in Melbourne
(porcelainteaparlour.
com) and Cha
Tea Providores in
Surfers Paradise
(ch ate a .co m. a u).ZEST
WISHESADDITIONAL WORDS: TARA ALI. PHOTOGRAPHY: GETTY IMAGES120