PHOTOGRAPHY BY MARIE ELLEN BROKENSHA; DASNIYA SOMMER COURTESY OF THE FESTIVAL OF REALLY GOOD SEX.
I
t began, as so many trans-
formations do, on the floor
of a Melbourne yoga stu-
dio. Except instead of
deep inhalations, I’m
watching eight couples
perform oral sex while I
casually eat my blow-job-
practice carrot. It’s a workshop
called The Art Of Fellatio at the
inaugural Melbourne Festival of
Really Good Sex, and the 40 people
in the room have spent the past hour
going to sexy-town on spit-soaked
root vegetables. The workshop facil-
itator, probably-not-her-real-name
Isla View, has led us through 23
carefully typed blow-job tips (most
involving more than just the tip) and
now it’s time for those so inclined to
practise on the real, fleshy thing.
“Make it a performance!” shouts
Isla, showing us how to turkey-slap
ourselves with a carrot.
I’m more comfortable than I
expected to be, but my heart is
beating a little faster. I’m on a learn-
ing-my-boundaries crash course.
The Festival of Really Good
Sex (FORGS), which launched inAustralia in 2011, isn’t a gaudy,
product-driven, pole-dancing Sex-
po, as you might expect, but rather a
mix of seminars and workshops
described as “radically inclusive,
experientially based, supportive,
ethical, experimental, passionate –
and intelligent”. Whether the event
is intellectualising sexuality or sex-
ing up intellectualism, the focus is
on discussion, boundary testing and
consent. It’s kinky, but thinky.
There are quite a few clothing-
optional/thinking essential festivals
like this around the world – the
Kutemajrvi Sex Festival in Finland
for example, which intersperses sex-
toy exhibits and musical acts with
lectures by prominent theorists.
Others, such as the Seattle Erotic
Art Festival, mix erotica with
thought-provoking interactive exhi-
bitions. At the super-nerdy end of
the spectrum, you could consider
registering for the Third Interna-
tional Congress On Love and Sex
With Robots this December.
There is a sense that this sort
of open discussion of sex and sexual-
ity is becoming more prevalent. DrRebecca Sheehan, the program
director of Gender Studies at Mac-
quarie University, says enrolments
in gender and sexuality studies are
rising, and the 18-year-olds signing
up already have a level of theoretical
sophistication not seen before, part-
ly due to the internet. “If you’re on
the margins – whether it’s with your
sexual orientation or with sexual
practice – there’s greater access to
[information about it],” she says.
But Dr Patrick Stokes, senior
lecturer in Philosophy at Deakin
University, warns that not all the
information out there is helpful –
especially in the unmapped world
of porn. “That’s a bit of a worry,
because porn has its own set of sym-
bolic meanings that we might not
want making their way into real-life
sex,” he says. Intelligent discussion
about sex seems to be one way of
helping ensure that your sexual
practice – whatever it is – stays safe,
informed and consensual.
Back at the raunch ranch, things
have moved far below the belt. “Be
sure to cover the toes with your other
hand before you flog the foot!”When Jo Thornely went to a Melbourne “kink-and-think”
event, she found her boundaries were bendier than expected
The Festival of Really Good
Sex, which launched in Australia
in 2011, mixes seminars with
hands-on sexual play.marieclaire.com.au 71SEX