Building Strong Families

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enough to sit still, but as they squirm or stare out the window, most
fathers throw in the towel and give up the whole idea.
A husband needs to muster his courage and take the initiative regu-
larly to call his wife and family back to the Scriptures as their source of
life and truth. He doesn’t have to rely on his own insights or creativity.
There are tools, like Dennis and Barbara Rainey’s devotional Moments
Together for Couples,or the daily devotional magazine Tabletalk,produced
by Ligonier Ministries, which a husband and wife can read together. A
husband can stand on the shoulders of others as he fulfills his prophetic
responsibility to declare the truth of the Scriptures to his wife.
He confronts sin and calls his wife to repentance.Perhaps this is the most
difficult assignment facing a husband, for several reasons. First, con-
fronting sin and calling a wife to repentance may rock the domestic
boat. A husband may decide he doesn’t want to incur his wife’s wrath.
But he needs to obey God’s call regardless of how his wife will
respond.
He may also fail to confront his wife’s sin because he has a soft
view of what it means to love her. Pointing out sin seems harsh and
judgmental, not loving. But our example here is Christ, who loves us
too much to overlook our sin. The same Prophet who wept over
Jerusalem, pronouncing judgment on Israel, comes to us today by His
Holy Spirit to convict us of our sin and to lead us to righteousness. If
we begin to understand the consequences of sin for ourselves and for
future generations, we will not think it loving to ignore or overlook
our wives’ ongoing patterns of sinful behavior.
A husband-prophet may also feel hypocritical pointing out the
speck in his wife’s eye when he is aware of his own sinfulness. But
Jesus’ instructions were clear on this. It is not necessarily hypocrisy to
confront someone else about her sin; it becomes hypocrisy when you
do so without first confessing and repenting of your own sin. “First,”
Jesus said, “take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see
clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye” (Matt. 7:5).
It is easy to see why husbands would rather not confront the sin-
ful behavior of their wives. (I include myself in their number!) Most
books I’ve read on how to have a happy marriage don’t suggest that


108 BUILDINGSTRONGFAMILIES

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