139more space in the house, in your life?
Yoga practice encourages expansion,
embodiment, and becoming. First, the body
stretches and reaches beyond the contained
space it occupies through the activities of
daily living. Even the fingers spread wide,
the shoulders move through their full range
of motion and the spine articulates a curve
forward, backward and then into rotation all
within the space of an hour. Deepening the
breath increases energy levels and inspires
creativity. How can that translate into your
‘new’ home? You are worthy of being your
next project and coaxing through a season
of development. Play music, paint a room,
find an organisation that speaks to your
heart where you can contribute your gifts.
Take up space.
Ironically, the strength of the relationship
with one’s child tends to determine the
length and depth of the grieving process.
Parents with uncomplicated and healthy ties
to their kids have an easier time letting go.
Your yoga practice is also a sacred space
to stop apologising for who you are, even if
your time on the mat reveals a need to tell
your child you are sorry for something you
did, or didn’t do during your years with themat home. Your success as a parent doesn’t
define the next stages of your life.Relationships
Finally, when a child leaves home there
is increased margin to lean into other
relationships in your life. Sometimes the people
who are closest to us don’t express that they
would love more of our time, and desire to be
more involved in our lives, as much as wanting
us to be involved in theirs. Perhaps it’s another
child still living at home, or a neighbour. Most
often it’s a spouse or partner.
Many yogis use their practice to explore
developing a relationship with god, whose
presence is always with us, and even more
pronounced when we find ourselves reeling
from life’s inevitable changes. Perhaps it’s
time to establish a long-standing intention
with exploring your spiritual life, and seeking
out that still, small voice inside. If you have
lost your faith, never found one, or find it
limping along – mid-life is a particularly
profound and vulnerable time to seek out
the peace that surpasses all understanding.
God gives our lives purpose again, and
the love that surpasses what any human
relationship can provide.To summarise, here are some practical tips
when you find yourself alone in your nest:
n Hold a space for the loss, and yourself.
n Realign your practice to rediscover
yourself. Try a new style, teacher or
even sequence. Extend your meditative
practice simply to ‘live the questions’ and
extend your savasana.
n Take up space. Age should never equate
to diminishing. Your role as a parent has
shifted but there is room to expand who
you are.
n Explore your faith. Sometimes it’s
through uninvited spaciousness we
discover we are not alone at all.
n If you have issues to forgive yourself for,
do it readily and sincerely. Don’t fill the nest
with baggage just to take up the space.
n Gently adjust your focus from ‘Why me?’
to ‘What’s next?’
n Buy a new mat: This is your new nest!
Every loss brings with it an opportunity to
realign identity and hold a space for what is
yet to come. The wisdom that comes from
yoga teaches us when to move from holding
to filling, and what is truly necessary to
make the nest a safe place for birthing of
new ideas, practices and possibilities.9th & 10th March 2019
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