The Globe and Mail - 02.11.2019

SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 2, 2019 | THEGLOBEANDMAIL O S 7

A

fter fidgeting through 15 minutes
of an interview, Rob Gronkowski
has finally been asked something
he feels deeply about – hangover
cures.
“First off, if you go too hard – and I can
tell you this from experience – you gotta
take that punishment for a couple of
hours. You gotta take the pain.”
All right.
“But if it’s just a decent night out, I
would start off with an I.V. An I.V. with all
the vitamins. They got nausea stuff in
there. That’s huge.”
Sure.
“Okay, a mineral bath with the Epsom
salts. An oxygen tank. You go in the in-
frared sauna.”
So what you’re telling me is that if I want
to cure a hangover, I need to play on an NFL
team. Who has access to intravenous?
“Oh, no, dude. Dude. They got I.V. ser-
vices,” Gronkowski says. “I’m fortunate
enough to make a good amount of money.
That’s when I spend it – when I truly need
it. Like getting 20 I.V.s for 20 of my friends
on vacation. That’s where it’s at.”
So if you were worried that retirement
from football would tame its wildest wild-
man, apparently not.
Gronkowski may have been the best
tight-end in NFL history. A 270-pound
sprinter with the hands of an oversized
tree frog. Three-time Super Bowl cham-
pion with the New England Patriots. Tom
Brady’s favourite touchdown target.
But Gronkowski’s real legend was born
out of his non-threatening frat-boy per-
sonality. He was Bill and Ted combined,
and all his adventures were excellent.
There was that time in Vegas. And that oth-
er time in Vegas. And that really crazy one
in Vegas.
We meet this week in a downtown To-
ronto hotel ballroom. He’s in Canada pro-
moting a line of cannabis-based health
products, CBD Medic. Gronkowski is an
investor and spokesman.
They’re setting up for an event. Every-
one is in business attire. Gronkowski is
wearing a T-shirt, pajama-bottom sweat-
pants and high-top sneakers. Not the fash-
ion sort. More the Value Village sort.

He’s drinking coffee out of a fine-china

cup. It looks like he’s sipping from a thim-

ble.

Only 30, Gronkowski retired abruptly

last spring. A lot of people think it’s more

of a sabbatical, that he’ll return to the game

soon. Gronkowski enjoys teasing about

this idea.

So are you retired? Like, retired retired?

“It’s retirement right now, baby,” Gron-

kowski says.

It is hard to picture Gronkowski retired.

Sitting around his house doing pull-ups

shirtless and in jeans beside an industrial

speaker while a strobe light goes off. Or

something.

Gronkowski still looks like a player – a

strange mix of impossibly lean and impos-

sibly big. At certain points, he will reach

out to emphasize a point by touching you

on the knee. It feels like being petted by a

bear.

He is a twitchy person who laughs a lot,

mostly at himself. Sitting still clearly pains

him.

“You gotta stay busy, man. Which I

have,” Gronkowski says. “When you’re not

busy, you start making the

wrong decisions easily, man.

I been there, too. I’ve learned

my lessons. I’ve made many

wrong decisions before.”

This is not said warningly

or mournfully. It’s said nos-

talgically. The unique thing

about Gronkowski – aside

from the generational talent

• was his ability to be a
  knucklehead without conse-
  quence. Everyone loved his
  outrages because not a one of
  them was mean-spirited.
  As he talks to you, Gronkowski is trying
  to figure out what you are – a dude or a
  scold. Are you going to get on him about
  head trauma or wasted opportunities or
  that time in Vegas? Once he realizes you
  are not, he relaxes. Once he relaxes, he
  starts making bad decisions again. But
  good-bad.
  “My favourite controversy I would say
  was when I body slammed my brother in
  Vegas.”
  Yes, that’s a good one. It was in a night-
  club. Gronkowski was up on stage, shirt-
  less, dancing spasmodically with his broth-
  er alongside. His arm – recently broken –
  was in a protective cast. He’d just signed an
  enormous new contract. Everyone in the
  crowd was filming.
  For no discernible reason, he decided to
  grab his equally enormous brother and
  awkwardly suplex him to the stage. Were
  you a normal-sized person and he’d done
  it to you, you’d be in traction for a month.
  “Yeah, I was a little tipsy. Thinking about
  it now ...” – Gronkowski gets a faraway
  look and I figure this is headed one way,

but – “... I’m glad it happened. Because

that’s a classic right there.”

Is your brother glad?

“We’re both glad it happened. Big time.

I’ll say, ‘You remember how much backlash

I took from body slamming you? That’s

AMAZING. That’s HISTORY now’. We were

all over ESPN. I can barely remember doing

it.”

Despite the goofball act, Gronkowski is

wily. He has said that he saved all of his NFL

earnings (more than US$50-million in to-

tal). He lived off his endorsement money.

He’s got a few businesses going, including

one with his brother Chris that manufac-

tures a line of protein-shake holders.

“Everything falls under one portfolio,”

Gronkowski says. “Staying active. Staying

busy.”

He’s given himself a new nickname

(which one assumes is already trade-

marked): “Mr. Recovery.”

“I’ve partied harder than any athlete. I

played harder than anyone. I had more

surgeries than anyone. I travelled non-

stop. And, dude, I just keep rolling.”

This is what leads in to the hangover

discussion.

Now he’s trying to figure

out what to do with what he

calls his “second life.” Clearly,

he misses football. The re-

gimen. The discipline. The

massages. He mentions mas-

sages several times.

Did he have a “come-to-

Jesus moment” that made

him decide to quit?

Gronkowski is leaned over

in his chair, but he sits back

now and looks straight at me

for a beat.

“Not a come-to-Jesus moment. But I’m

getting there. Like, you go through life, you

get signals. You get signs. That’s a sign right

there that you just brought that up. Maybe

I gotta go find that come-to-Jesus mo-

ment.”

Gronkowski thinks I am talking about

an honest-to-God religious conversion. No

wonder everyone loved this guy so much.

He is utterly guileless.

He talks about himself as though he’s

geriatric. His conversation is notably de-

void of glory-days reminiscences. He

doesn’t mention any of his on-field

achievements. If he’s coming back to the

NFL, it doesn’t seem top of mind.

“I’m not going to lie. At 21, I needed to be

a rock star,” Gronkowski says, arms pump-

ing in the air as though that’s what rock

stars do. “Now at 30, I’m, like, I need to go to

the spa. Get a massage. Relax. I was already

a rock star. I’m happy just laying down. But

there’s still times I need to be a rock star.”

So what’s next? “I see a bright future,

man,” Gronkowski says, loud enough that

a few heads turn. “I see a very busy future.”

Rob Gronkowski flexes his muscles at an August news conference in New York announcing he would be a spokesman for CBD Medic.
He was in Toronto this past week promoting the company’s cannabis-based products.ILYAS.SAVENOK/GETTYIMAGESFORCBDMEDIC

It’sGronkandMr.Recovery’s

excellentretirementadventure

Ifyouwereworriedthat

lifeafterfootballwouldtame

thesport’swildestwildman,

well,apparentlynot

CATHAL
KELLY

OPINION

TORONTO

Myfavourite

controversyIwould

saywaswhenI

bodyslammedmy

brotherinVegas.

ROB GRONKOWSKI

FORMERNEWENGLAND

PATRIOTSTIGHTEND

O

ver 25 years as an NFL head
coach, Bill Belichick has
prepared his team for all
kinds of quarterbacks and offen-
sive schemes.
But none of those experiences
were much help this week to the
six-time Super Bowl winner,
whose unbeaten New England Pa-
triots (8-0) face Lamar Jackson
and the Baltimore Ravens (5-2) on
Sunday night.
Jackson’s speed and agility
make him a threat to run from a
set play or when cornered in the
pocket. The second-year QB is the
focal point of a run-oriented at-
tack that utilizes his quickness
and the power bursts of running

backs Mark Ingram and Gus Ed-

wards.

Trying to emulate Jackson’s

quickness in practice is virtually

impossible because the 2016 Heis-

man Trophy winner is a one-of-a-

kind star.

“We don’t have a guy. I don’t

know if anybody else in the league

has a guy, either,” Belichick said.

“He’s a very talented player with a

great skill set that’s unique.”

Jackson leads the NFL with a

6.94 yards a carry average and

ranks 10th with 576 yards rushing.

He is the only QB in NFL history to

pass for at least 1,600 yards and

run for 500 through the first seven

games of a season.

Miami stacked the line and

dared Jackson to pass in the sea-

son opener, and he responded

with five touchdown passes and a

perfect 158.3 quarterback rating.

“We take advantage of what the

defence gives us,” Jackson said. “If

they give us the opportunity to

pass, we’re going to do that.”

Make a choice, New England,

and hope for the best.

DEFENSIVE DOMINANCE

The Ravens will face a Patriots de-

fence ranked among the best in

several categories.

New England is allowing an

NFL-low 7.6 points a game and

ranks second in both yards al-

lowed (234.0) and passing yards

allowed (148.8). It’s fourth in rush-

ing yards allowed (85.2). Take-

aways have been the Patriots’ big-

gest calling card in 2019. They

have an NFL-best 27 and lead the

league with 19 interceptions. They

have recorded at least one pick in

each game.

NEW KICKER

Since Stephen Gostkowski went

on injured reserve Oct. 3, New En-

gland’s kicking game has been an

adventure. Mike Nugent was re-

leased this week after four games

in which he missed three field-

goal attempts and an extra point.

The Patriots have signed 11-

year NFL vet Nick Folk to replace

him. Folk made 80.3 per cent of his

field-goal attempts in three sea-

sons with Dallas, seven with the

New York Jets and four games

with Tampa Bay in 2017, his most

recent stop in the NFL before join-

ing the Patriots.

Folk, who turns 35 next week,

last kicked in the now-defunct Al-

liance of American Football, boot-

ing a league-record 55-yard field

goal in March for the Arizona Hot-

shots.

BYE BENEFITS BALTIMORE

A bye week enabled the Ravens to

get three players healthy again.

Cornerback Jimmy Smith (knee),

receiver Marquise Brown (ankle)

and linebacker Patrick Onwuasor

(ankle) all practised this week

and hope to play Sunday.

THEASSOCIATEDPRESS

AgainstJackson,Patswillhavetomakeachoiceandhopeforthebest

DAVID GINSBURGBALTIMORE

D

espite being among the top

quarterbacks in passing

yards, Aaron Rodgers and

Philip Rivers find themselves go-

ing in opposite directions heading

into Sunday’s game. Rodgers and

his Green Bay Packers (7-1) are off

to their best start since 2011, while

Rivers and the Los Angeles Char-

gers (3-5) have dropped three of

their past four.

Rodgers, who is second with

2,324 yards, has been revitalized

under Matt LaFleur, who is the

first coach in his first year to win

seven of his first eight games since

Jim Harbaugh in 2011. Chargers

coach Anthony Lynn is hopinga

change in offensive play-callers

can jump-start his team after Ken

Whisenhunt was fired as co-ordi-

nator on Monday and replaced by

quarterbacks coach Shane Stei-

chen.

“It’s obvious these first eight

weeks that we just haven’t been

good enough, offensively,” said

Rivers, who is third in the league

with 2,315 yards.

The Chargers have been out of

synch offensively for most of the

season. They have been held un-

der 40 rushing yards in four

straight games, becoming the first

team since the 1947 Detroit Lions

to be stuck in neutral that long.

Green Bay comes in as one of

the more potent offences in the

league. Aaron Jones is tied for sec-

ond in rushing touchdowns with

eight, while Rodgers had a league-

leading 21 completions of 20 yards

or more in October.

“I think we’ve definitely found

different recipes to victory every

week,” Rodgers said.

Another player who could ben-

efit from the Chargers change at

offensive co-ordinator is Melvin

Gordon. The running back is ave-

raging only 2.6 yards per carry

with one carry over 10 yards in

four games.

The Chargers had only 12

running plays in last week’s win at

Chicago, but Lynn has hinted that

he wants to see more carries and

consistency on the ground.

The Chargers haven’t had

much of a home-field advantage

this season. After going 10-6 at

their tiny stadium in Carson,

Calif., the past two seasons, they

have dropped their past three.

Green Bay wide receiver Da-

vante Adams, who missed the

past four games because of turf

toe, returned to practice this

week.

The Packers and Chargers are

two of the top three teams when it

comes to using their running

backs in the passing game. The

Chargers are tied with Patriots for

the league lead in backfield recep-

tions with 73, while the Packers

are third with 63.

Los Angeles’s Austin Ekeler

leads running backs in receptions

(51) and receiving yards (507). He

is on pace to become the first back

in league history to have 100 or

more catches and 1,000 yards in

the same season.

Aaron Jones had a career-high

159 receiving yards on seven re-

ceptions and scored two touch-

downs last week. It was the sec-

ond-most receiving yards ina

game by a Packers running back.

Green Bay LB Za’Darius Smith

and Los Angeles DE Joey Bosa are

on a roll when it comes to sacks.

Smith is tied for fourth in the

league with eight sacks and had

two in last week’s win at Kansas

City. Bosa, tied for seventh with

seven, is the first Charger to get

multiple sacks in consecutive

games since 2010.

THEASSOCIATEDPRESS

SurgingPackers

settheireyes

onstruggling

Chargers

JOE REEDYCARSON,CALIF.

FOOTBALL