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liberal firebrands such as Alexandria
Ocasio-Cortez, but, not unlike them,
he seeks to challenge what he thinks
has been Washington’s rightward drift.
“There’s this set of assumptions, es-
pecially around economics, that has
been accepted and shared really across
parties,” he says. “The argument was
basically over whether we should cut
taxes more for the middle class or more
for the wealthiest. The idea that the
wealthy were paying too little was not
something the Democrats were willing
to raise most of the time.” To try to re-
center norms, Buttigieg has organized
his speeches around basic concepts,
such as “freedom” and “democracy,”
that he thinks the right has co-opted as
its own. “I think we should be willing
to defend or question policies based
mainly on what they do for us in the ev-
eryday,” he says. For instance, when the
mayor speaks about climate change,
he talks about two major floods that
South Bend faced in a space of two
years—making it, as he puts it, “a se-
curity issue.” He announced himself
as a supporter of the Green New Deal.
That two-pronged approach to pol-
itics—foundational and unifying on
the high level, flexible and solutions-
minded on the ground—is sharply per-
sonal for Buttigieg. It was only four
years ago when, as mayor, he nervous-
ly came out to his parents as
gay at the dinner table. A
few months later, he came
out to his constituents, in an
eloquent op-ed in the South
Bend Tribune. “It took years
of struggle and growth for me
to recognize that it’s just a fact
of life, like having brown hair,
and part of who I am,” he
wrote. The obvious question
followed, both in public and
at home. Was there—as his
mother eagerly put it—“someone”?
Sadly, no: Buttigieg says he had nev-
er once been in love until, in his early
30s, he met Chasten. They found each
other via Hinge, a dating app, which
Buttigieg had filtered for nearby Chi-
cago (his solution to the awkwardness
of trying to date people in a city of
which you are mayor). They married
last summer, at a South Bend church,
through a ceremony in which he found
both private and public import. “As
somebody whose marriage—the single
most important thing in my life—exists
as the consequence of a single-vote
margin on the Supreme Court, I can’t
ever forget what’s at stake in politics,”
he tells me.
After a while, Chasten wanders in
and takes a seat near his husband. He
is younger and blonder and, by his own
description, “whimsical” in all the ways
the mayor is contained. He has worked
in theater education and now teaches
at a South Bend Montessori school,
though he is on leave for the campaign.
They balance each other. “There was a
long period when my job was my life,”
the mayor says. “Chasten respects the
political process, but he’s also put down
a lot of boundaries.” For instance: a
weekly “enforceable” date night. Also:
dogs. As Chasten takes a seat, the But-
tigiegs’ two rescues rush around him.
“They have kind of a Yin and Yang
thing going on,” the mayor says of the
animals. “Buddy”—a stout beagle
mix—“is the more social one. He’s very
food-oriented. He’s been on a weight-
loss journey. Truman”—a waifish mix
of similar size—“was absolutely ter-
rified of everything when we got him.
I think he’d been very badly abused.
Chasten got him stoned today on
anti-anxiety meds because he’s got to
get his nails clipped.”
Truman, as if on cue, begins to wan-
der toward the piano, offering a dazedand abashed glance over one shoulder
before shying farther away.
The mayor looks back toward the
gregarious Buddy. “And Buddy got
into the food bin last night.”
“The problem with beagles is they
can eat themselves to death,” Chasten
says.
“It was a very gassy night,” the may-
or observes.
Chasten says that his political
opinions have traditionally been re-
active and impassioned, but that the
mayor has inspired him to take morereasoned views. He points to a dis-
agreement that they had about the fate
of a public park, with a golf course,
that the mayor decided to sell off. “I’m
a fan of green space and parks!” says
Chasten, who was horrified. Slowly,
the mayor brought him around. “He
thought that if the city could get this
out of its hands, and off the books,
we could put the money toward other
resources,” he explains. “It’s very rare
to have an easy conversation in which
Peter won’t ask you to think about
things differently.” He smiles. “It’s sort
of like always being in grad school.”
The mayor has often said that they
hope to have children but is vague
on when, exactly, this would happen:
For now, the business of politics has
shaped and constrained their shared
life. Chasten has become an eloquent
and popular voice on social media
for gay Americans in the heartland.
Though he’s ambivalent about such
digital platforms (“We have a don’t-
read-the-comments-section house-
hold”), he is, as his husband likes to
put it, “alive to” the importance of
being a visible Midwestern couple.
“We’re out to embrace it and not
run away from it,” Buttigieg says,
more circumspectly, “but also not
let it become the main thing.” He
sees himself as a bridge between the
LGBTQ community and the
Christian community, two
groups that—in places like
South Bend, at least—hav-
en’t always mixed.
“There are a lot of people
here who would like to find
their way to the right side of
history but don’t really know
what’s expected of them,” the
mayor says. “We have a mar-
riage that’s kind of like every
other marriage, and we’ve
got our dogs and our home. That is,
if anything, a way to relate to other
mostly straight people that maybe
wasn’t available to me a few years ago.
We’re conscious, of course, of what it
means: You can see it in some of the
people who come to our events, either
for an LGBT kid who’s trying to figure
out where to fit in or a lot of older
gay people who just never could have
imagined that it would be possible to
run, let alone to have a shot. But it’s
not something, I think, that defines
either of us.”“As somebody whose marriage—
the single most important thing in
my life—exists as the consequence
of a single-vote margin on the
Supreme Court, I can’t ever forget
what’s at stake in politics”