[OCTOBER 2019 |HORSEILLUSTRATED.COM 19 ]There was a slightly raised platform in the
barn, maybe 12 inches high, where utensils
and a wheelbarrow were stored, and Roger
blundered behind it one day and managed to
get himself stuck for several hours. The own-
ers were able to free him after some creative
moves with ropes, and they blocked off access
to the spot in case Roger got any more ideas.
Everywhere you looked on the farm was another
barricaded zone where Roger had caused or
thought about causing some degree of mayhem,
and it seemed to be fairly safe for the old man.
But one day Roger had not gotten the memo
and completely outdid himself, sneaking to
the top of a steep grassy hill behind the barn
when no one was looking. He lost his balance
and tumbled down the slope, landing mirac-
ulously upright against the barn in a dug-out
area banked with railroad ties. He was good
and stuck, with one leg jammed underneath
the aluminum wall of the pole barn.
The neighborhood Roger alert was sounded,
and soon reinforcements arrived. It was several
hours before Roger could be freed, and it was
hard on him and the neighbors both. His dis-
traught owners called me to come look him over
and sew up a few lacerations he’d sustained dur-
ing the ordeal, and I came out the next morning.
DODGING DONKEY
Roger was annoyed at being kept inside for my
visit, and he kept blundering in circles on top of
me and my equipment. He didn’t weigh much,
being a small donkey, but his hooves hurt when
they pressed into the tops of my feet. The own-
ers short-tied him to a rail, which made him
mad. Because of his age, I didn’t dare give him
a regular sedative, so I injected him with some
Valium which affected him minimally.
He had a decent-sized laceration on one
front leg and another on the opposite hind. He
tolerated me clipping the wounds reasonably
well. When I went to scrubbing and trying to
numb the wounds, things changed, and Roger
danced from side to side, waved feet threat-
eningly and air kicked a few times just to let
me know he still had it in him. I believed him,
and 47 or not, I fi gured a kick from those sharp
hooves would still hurt, so I was careful.
Robyn’s husband Ed had to hold up a hind
leg for me to get a suture placed in the deep-
est wound, and Robyn distracted Roger with
a mixture of treats, head-thumping, a twitch,
and by howling loudly in his drooping ears
while I danced awkwardly around the kicking
leg trying to tie my sloppy suture. Ed grunted
and sweated, doggedly holding on to the limb,
and all three of us realized that while we
might not be in Roger’s age range, we were
defi nitely not in our 20s anymore.TIME TO RECOVER
Finally it was done, the last knot was tied,
and Roger gave all of us menacing looks as
we cleaned up the mess around him. Robyn
untied him and he made angry circles around
all of us, at one point butting me out of the
way, and I snatched up my kit before he could
knock it into the dirt.
Sweet talk and attempts at petting Roger
only made him madder. At last Robyn brought
him some treats, which he haughtily ignored.
I gave Robyn some antiseptic spray for the
wounds. I didn’t dare put Roger on systemic
antibiotics, having given him a horrible case
of diarrhea the year before when I put him on
oral medications for a skin infection. He was
just going to have to take his chances.
I was packing up the truck as Ed marched past
me, a roll of fencing wire under his arm and a
bucket of tools in his hands. Another Roger-proof-
ing was underway. Robyn shook her head.
“What next, Dr. Diehl? I swear, just when you
think you’ve covered everything that he could pos-
sibly hurt himself on, he fi nds something else!”
I didn’t have any suggestions, and there
were defi nitely no husbandry tips in any of
my texts or journals regarding the care and
feeding of a 47-year-old donkey. I fi gured we’d
all just have to keep winging it.
Roger healed well, went back to eating with
his usual gusto, and as of today, has managed
to stay out of further trouble. Ed and Robyn
continue to Roger-proof the farm as possible
trouble spots occur to them, so it seems likely
that the old man will live to see 48. HICOURTNEY S. DIEHL, DVM, has been an equine vet-
erinarian since 2000. She is the author of Horse Vet:
Chronicles of a Mobile Veterinarian and Stories of Eric
the Fox, first-place winner of the CIA EVVY award. She
is currently working on her third book.Roger had the run of his farm,
and while the owners had done their
best to donkey-proof the environment,
he still managed to fi nd ways to get
himself into trouble.