2019-10-01 Cosmopolitan UK

(Ron) #1
know
it now.
Intheinterests
ofjournalistic
transparency, this was physically the
hardest thing I have ever done in my
life. You are climbing for seven days.
There was one particular moment
when it was p-o-u-r-i-n-g with rain –
I mean exactly like that scene from
Four Weddings And A Funeral when
Hugh Grant kisses Andie MacDowell.
Apart from I was wearing hiking
boots and a rucksack that weighed
the same as Danny DeVito. We came
around ANOTHER bend and were

wentjungle


trekkingto find


a lostcityin


Colombia...


HotelTayromar,inthenortherncity
ofSantaMarta,fora pre-tripbriefing.
Mygroupwasreallyvaried:a mix
ofcouplesandsingles,fromall
overtheworld.I wasparticularly
pleasedtoseeoneA-gradehottie
whowasmotivationinhimself.

Didyougofull-oncamo?
Asa fashiondirector,I hadfully
preppedforthistripasthough
I wasstarringinsomekindofhiking
photoshoot.Peoplehadfilledmy
earswithwartime-stylehorrorstories
oftoeshangingoffandill-fitting
bootsturningtheirfeetblack.I can
smuglyreportthatI didn’tuseONE
blisterplaster.Myfeetweretheonly
onesinourgroupthatcameout
unscathed, thanks to a very thorough
boot fitting pre-trip at Cotswold
Outdoor. Yes, it was excruciatingly
embarrassing pretending to “hike”
up a step machine. No, I’m not
even a little bit sorry I did it.

Jungle trekking: tough
as it sounds?
It’s kind of like that song by The
Streets, Fit But You Know It, apart from
I’m not fit and I didn’t really know it
before this expedition. But I definitely

Colombia:notexactly


Mallorca,isit?
Notintheslightest.Andthere’snot
a sniffofa pinacoladaora cut-out
swimsuitinsight.Theonlybitofthe
tripwhichfeelsa bitLoveIslandis
that you don’t actually find out who
you’ll be trekking with until day one,
when you all meet in the lobby of the


AMY


BANNERMAN...


Hotel Tayromar:
beautiful even before
seven days of trekking

Teyuna: the
world’s most
scenic step class
Free download pdf