44 • happiful.com • September 2019
Did you enjoy the work?
I did, though there was part of me
that didn’t. But it wasn’t the side
that was helping people. I think
it’s because your caseload is so
big, and you can only have half an
hour with people.
Also, because a lot of people don’t
turn up for their appointments,
the way the service deals with that
is that you will be fully booked,
back-to-back, but the expectation
is that people won’t turn up – so
you can do your notes. But then
you get a couple of days in a row
where everyone turns up. And
you’re like: ‘Ah! That’s cool, but I
can’t do my notes!’ I think it gets
you into a negative mentality,
because you’re hoping that
someone doesn’t turn up.You mentioned that you
had your own problems
with anxiety when you
were younger. Did you feel
supported?
I didn’t, because my older brother
had very severe mental issues, so
I felt like my issues weren’t really
significant in comparison. I was
also quite good academically, so
the school didn’t really bother.
I started not going to school for
quite a while. The headteacher
spoke to me about it, and I just
said: ‘I’m going to the library to
study.’ And she was like: ‘Oh that’s
fine then!’ I had been going to the
library, but not studying. I was just
taking a breather – all the time!
The main thing I did was go to
university and decided I was going
to reinvent myself. But I didn’t
really know how to interact with
people very well, so I was trying to
bond with people by asking them
where the buses went!That’s a good line!
It is! I think I’m still a bit socially
anxious now, but only with
specific things. I think by helping
other people, you also help
yourself. Part of working with
other people is dealing with my
social anxiety fears, so I just got
used to it.And then you went on
Bake Off – what a huge
achievement.
Yeah! I think the reason I applied
for it was partly I wanted to prove
to myself that I could do it.Do you have any favourite
behind the scenes moments?
I remember one of the weeks I
was crying... [Laughs]. We had a
lady who caught up with us after
every episode to check we were
OK, and looked after us. I said to
her that I thought crying made
me weak, and she taught me that
crying is a strength because you’ve
put yourself in a situation that
makes you vulnerable. Then I was
like: ‘Right I’m going to cry about
everything!’
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