ed
u
c
at
e(^) -
(^) M
ak
in
g
(^) t
h
e
G
ra
de
75
S
uccess and accomplishment take on more meaning in high
school. College is only four years away and the pressure is on.
High school brings additional stress in the form of making
more independent life choices related to riskier areas such as
sex, drugs and money, right along with the need to establish
a sense of identity and social presence. In addition, spirituality comes
more into play as teens are either finding religion or rejecting it, as well as
dealing with the impact of racial tensions and sexual orientation choices.
The stress of becoming an adult is as high as it’s ever been, but now
we have more tools to offer our teens to help them negotiate this phase
of life. The prefrontal cortex is still developing, so take advantage of this
brain development phase by building in emotional intelligence skills from
the bottom up.
Start the conversation by discussing the different types of intelligence
including a focus on emotional intelligence. Practice emotional awareness
with them. Openly model emotional regulation by showing them what
you do to help get your emotional reactions under control. Practice
mindfulness together as a way to learn emotional regulation.Signs &
Behaviors
q Healthy relationships
q Regulated responses to life
q Self-esteem
q Short recovery time and increased
resilience
q Increased self-awareness
q Empathetic
q Regulates emotions
q Healthy social skills
q Improved decision-making with the
ability to identify consequences
q Decreased impulsivity
q Assertiveness
q Problem-solves
q Listens
q Shows compassion
q Tolerates failure
q Attentive and can concentrateWhat You Can Do
D Talk about emotional intelligence
as an important facet of identity
D Model self-awareness and
mindfulness
D Talk about the importance of
emotions in decision-making
D Teach a variety of different
coping skills
D Show how you deal with your
emotions in a healthy and self-
aware manner
D Demonstrate problem-solving
and decision-making, and how
you evaluate the pros and cons of
decisions
D Listen
D Be empathic
D Engage in emotional expression
D Show them how to tolerate failure
D Teach them how to be
compassionate and kind
D Teach them positive conflict
resolutionConversation
Starters“
Our relationship is going to
change. I want to make sure
you have the tools you need to
succeed and establish a sense
of who you are. Two really
important parts of identity
are emotional intelligence and
social-emotional learning. What
do you know about these and
how I can help?”“
Our feelings are clues to help
us understand what is going on.
Fear, anger and sadness are all
clues that something is up that
we need to figure out. Checking
in with your feelings on a regular
basis will help you accurately
read the situations you are in so
that you can make healthy and
safe choices.”V9 - FALL maskmatters.org