SHOULD I STAY OR SHOULD I GO?This is the kind of frustrating
advice my mother hands out, but it’s difficult to know whether
you should move overseas until you’ve done it. So, if the move
feels possible, then it’s at least worth exploring. I’ve only done this
once, so I’m no expert, but some useful questions to ask yourself
include: will I starve to death there and, if not, how long will they
let me stay? In other words, it’s a good idea to take a look at visas
and work out which countries will let you work, and what the
conditions are. Boring, administrative stuff aside, it also helps to
make a list of the things you really value, then think about what
life might look like in your potential new home. For instance, when
I moved to North America, I didn’t think about the fact that winter
is months and months of bitter cold and darkness. Learn from my
mistakes, or be ready to invest in a SAD lamp.
...................A LIFE IN BOXESIn an ideal world, you’ll make a plan for packing
many months before you depart. In the real world, you might find
yourself gifting everything you own to friends in thedays before you
catch the plane. Both are fine, but in either case, it’s helpful to
start by making a list of what you can reasonably take with you,
and what you need to get rid of. Start by shedding big items, like
couches and tables – your house might look a little bare for a while
but, trust me, you don’t want to be screaming, “TAKE MYCOUCH!”
on Facebook a few days before your big adventure. Prioritise things
that make you feel at home, like framed photos and knick-knacks,
but keep logistics in mind – anything you take, you’ll have to figure out
how to transport safely across the globe. Other factors to consider:
the climate you’re jetting into; how long you’ll be away; and the
size of your new abode.
...................SO LONG, FAREWELLBy a series of clumsy accidents, when my
partner and I left Australia, we ended up having multiple going away
‘events’ – some planned, some not. If you’re bursting with social
energy, then go ahead and organise a rolling farewell, but if the idea
of endless leaving drinks sounds exhausting, then plan one central
event well in advance, and compress all your goodbyes into a single
evening. You’ll have a tonne of bits and pieces to do before you
jet off, anyway – like packing, cleaning your house, and preparing
passports, visas and money – so try not to stretch yourself too thin.
It’s also good to remember that these goodbyes are not forever,
and you can literally come home at any point. That’ll make it easier
to kick people out of your backyard at the end of the evening.
...................TOUCHING DOWNIn the early weeks of settling into a new country,
it can be hard to work out exactly what you’re meant to be doing.
Half your brain thinks you definitely must be on holiday, and the
other half is freaking out because you badly need to unpack boxesand make a few trips to IKEA. Plus, you’re probably dealing with a
little bit of jetlag and a series of confusing interactions concerning
everything from postage to health insurance. A little pre-planning
goes a long way, starting with a list of things you know you’ll need
to organise once you land: phone plans, bank accounts, finding
a doctor. I naively assumed these tasks were similar anywhere
you go, and I suffered the consequences in needless bureaucracy.
On a side note, if you’re moving somewhere where you have friends
or friends-of-friends, then set up a drinks date or coffee when you
arrive and reap the benefits of their local knowledge.
...................FINDING YOUR FEET Arriving in the US, I assumed I’d need some
time to adapt to cultural differences, like the fact that Americans are
the least self-deprecating people in the world, while New Zealanders
and Australians thrive on a constant stream of jokes made at our own
expense. The cultural differences were tricky, but nowhere near as
much as the logistical nightmares we encountered simply because
we’re foreigners and don’t know how things work. If you’re moving
to America, for instance, it’s worth knowing that life gets sort of
hard without ‘credit’, and a social security number is essential for
stuff like opening a bank account. Logistics take time to get used
to, but some things you can prepare for in advance – like stocking
up on items you might not find in foreign pharmacies. When friends
come to visit and ask if I want Vegemite, the answer is always,
“No, but please bring Panadol.”
...................A FRIEND IN NEED Making friends as an adult is always a little
tricky, especially when you’re also trying to navigate a new currency,
new healthcare system, new public transport, and maybe even
a new language. It’s true to an extent that new chums will come
with time, but if you want a friendship group that extends beyond
the people you work with, my advice is to deep-dive into a hobby.
Once you’re starting to feel relatively settled, look around for
strange team sports, crochet circles, book clubs or hiking groups.
Basically, treat yourself like a school-aged child desperately in need
of extracurricular activity. If the search fails, there’s no shame in
looking around for fellow migrants. After a single month in the US,
all I wanted to see was an Australian with a beer.
...................STAYING CONNECTED The curse of Oceania is that when we
move overseas, we’re almost always moving into a different time
zone – sometimes to places where the seasons are back-to-front
and phone calls are extremely long distance. I know that social
media is a scourge upon the planet, but it’s also the easiest way
to stay in touch with folks back home – not just because you
can trawl through people’s feeds for details of their lives, but also
because you can find out what’s going on in the local news. It sounds
obvious, but different nations have different preoccupations when it
comes to current affairs, and it’s easy to forget what’s happening
far away where all your friends live. Keeping in touch requires a bit
of effort, so spend some time sending unsolicited messages about
your life and asking people how their day’s been, because you’re
unlikely to bump into each other on the street. Also: make the
most of apps like WhatsApp and Skype. When you’re feeling lonely,
a five-minute face-to-face chat can make all the difference.
...................MAKING THE MOST OF IT ALL One not-as-depressing-as-it-sounds
tip is to vastly lower your expectations – or get rid of them completely.
If you do that, you’re basically guaranteed to improve your experience.
Moving overseas is meant to be very ‘hashtag life-changing’, and
that’s a lot of pressure. For the first six months, I spent every
weekend engaged in ‘activities’, because that’s what you do when
you travel. But living overseas is different to travelling overseas.
You have far more time up your sleeve, which means it’s OK to
spend the occasional weekend sitting in bed watching Netflix.
Besides, moving is tiring! Anything you can do to help yourself
settle in will improve your experience in the long run, and you’ll
have more energy to venture into your new town and fill Instagram
with photos of your adventures.crossing over
THINKING OF MOVING OVERSEAS?
SAM PRENDERGAST HAS SOME
TIPS AND TRICKS FOR MAKING
A SMOOTH TRANSITION.
try this at home