Reader’s Digest Canada – September 2019

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What’s in a Name?

Women’s deodorant

scents: rose, cotton,

spring, meadow.

Men’s: WINTER ICE,

SHARKNADO, GLA-

CIER PUNCH, GUN.

— @SOPHIE_GADD

Time Is a Construct

I hate when I’m 20 min-

utes into my run on the

treadmill and I look

down and the timer

says 43 seconds.

— @PIPERSMITH

Sorry, I wasn’t listening

when you were talking

about your dog. I was

busy looking in my

phone for pictures of

my superior dog.

— @PRIMAWESOME

If you pick someone up

at the airport after the

age of 30, you are either

falling in love or a per-

sonal assistant.

— @SMICKABLE

my contacts, I can’t see

too clearly.) So I quickly

trapped the mouse

with a box and put my

contacts in so I could

take a look, only to find

out that I did not trap a

mouse. I trapped my

hairbrush.

—CELIA GRACE DENNEY

When my girlfriend

makes me angry, I look

at her through a fork

and pretend she’s in jail.

It heals me spiritually.

— @MRMAKETHINGD

When I woke up today,

I thought I saw a mouse

on my floor. (Without

reader’s digest

rd.ca 13

LIFE’S LIKE THAT