Drum – 15 August 2019

http://www.drum.co.za 15 AUGUST (^2019) | 9
e rego ngtoworkonfixingthings’
DARREN
STEWART,
INSTAGRAM/@ZODWALIBRAM,
FACEBOOK/NTOBEKO.LINDA
andI’lltakehalf,”sheadds,referringto
theR80 000 shegavetohisfamily.
Accordingto traditional leader
DrSiphoNgwenya,lobolaismeantto
unitefamilies.“Lobolaisnotbuyingthe
servicesofthebrideorthegroom,”he
tellsDRUM.
“Bypayinglobolayouwereaskingfor
unityamongfamilies.
“Ananimalisslaughteredafterit has
beenpaidtoannouncetheunityoffami­
liestotheancestors.
“Thatprocesscannotbereversed.
Familiesareunited,period.
“Whencouplesdecidetoseparateand
disagree,it doesn’tmeanubuhlobo(the
unityamongfamilies)is alsobroken.You
arestillunitedbutnottogether,therefore
lobolacannotbereturned.
“Evenwhenonepartnerisfound
cheating,intheworst­casescenarioa
pricecanbepaidbytheguiltyparty.But
thelobolacannotbereturned.”
Ntobekosayshisfamilyhasnoissues
withreturningthelobola. “I’mnota
gold­digger,I workformymoneyand
sheknowsthat,”hetellsus.
HestilllovesZodwa,hesays.“Sheand
I werehappybeforeallthismediaatten­
tion.Maybethat’sthemistakewemade

• byputtingourrelationshipoutthereit
  becametoodemanding.
  “Butwewilldothingstherightway.
  Shedidit therightway,”hesays,referring
  tothereturningofthelobola.
  “ButI’mkeepingthering,”headdswith
  a laugh.
  Althoughthey’vecalledofftheirwed­
  ding,they’restillverymuchinlove.
  Therewasa shortbreak­up but they
  quickly made up again. Now they’re just
  finding each other again without the
  pressure of planning their nuptials.

“We love eac

other, it’s that si

ple,” Zodwa says.

“We called it off

can work on fixin

tionship first.”

S

HE hit the bottle when their

relationship hit the skids.

“When we broke up, I was

downing three bottles of Jack

Daniel’s a night to numb the

pain,” Zodwa says.

But they weren’t apart for too long.

“You know I can have any man I want

but I chose him, and he chose me. At

least we are still together and working

on us.”

She’s gone to lengths to make her rela­

tionship work with her young partner,

who’s 11 years her junior.

The mother of one has even opted for

vaginalrejuvenationtreatments.

“Iwantedtoenhanceoursexlife,”

Zodwa says. “He knows I’m a beast in the

bedroom, but I just wanted it tighter –

not that it was loose, but men like it

tighter.”

Zodwa recently had three vaginal

tighteningsessions where she was put

l anaesthetic. “It wasn’t

t all and it took me four

to heal. I mean business,

beko knows.”

Each session costs R2 250,

ays Dr Mahendra Prem­

hand, who performed the

urgery in Umhlanga.

“Women do vaginal reju­

enation and vaginal tight­

ing for different reasons,”

says. “Some feel a change

eir elasticity especially af­

ngchildren.”

handapproachedthere ­

alityTVstarafterseeinghowopen­mind­

ed she was. “She’s comfortable in her

skin and makes taboo conversations

comfortableforothers.”

Theprocedurecomeswithverylittle

tonoside­effects, he says. “As long as

women refrain from having sexual inter­

course for four to five days and wash nor­

mally without using any scented soaps,

then all should heal quickly.”

Zodwa’s last session was three weeks

ago and she’s fully recovered now.

Her lover loves the effects of the treat­

ment, he tells us when we speak to him.

“It works. Not that I was complaining

before, but whatever she did works,” Nto­

beko says.

Zodwa is happy too. “I’m not ashamed

to say my moomoo was a bit loose, but

now it’s tight,” she says. “As long as I’m

satisfying my man, I am okay.”

She’s clearly not shy to talk about her

sexuality. “I want to teach other women

who, like me, grew up with nothing that

they can be whoever they want to be and

do whatever they want with their lives

and their bodies,” she says.

“No one can tell me what to wear or

how to behave. It’s my life.”

Zodwa hopes she’ll find her happily

ever after one day. “I want to make mon­

ey, but I also love being loved. But I won’t

put up with nonsense either,” she says.

“Ntobeko is young. He still has a bright

future ahead of him and I don’t want to

control him just because I amolder.

“For now, he can enjoy thetightmoo­

moo and let’s just be happy.”

FROM FAR LEFT:

Zodwa now won’t

havemoredress

fittings.Ntobeko’s

mom,Nokukhanya

Linda, and family

are returning the

lobola money but

he’llkeepthe ring

Zodwa recently received a vaginal

rejuvenation procedure, performed by

Dr Mahendra Premchand. She wanted to

keep her body young, she says.

NEWS