AUGUS T 12, 2019 | SPORTS ILLUSTRATED 27
CONFIDENCE GAME
AFTER SIX MONTHS WITHOUT FOOTBALL, IT’S
TEMPTING TO DRAW GRAND CONCLUSIONS FROM
MEANINGLESS PRESEASON ACTION. WE’RE HERE
TO HELP MANAGE YOUR EXPECTATIONS
next Victor Cruz.WHAT IT
ACTUALLY MEANS:
Your team has
discovered a
great gunner
for the punt unit.WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE:
Players have an extra tune-up game to get in
a rhythm.WHAT IT ACTUALLY MEANS:
Players have an extra chance to get injured on
an infamously poor playing surface.WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE:
He’s bouncing back. He’ll make
three more Pro Bowls.WHAT IT ACTUALLY MEANS: He’s
feeling fresh after spending all
spring at his Malibu beach home.THE SITUATION:
Your team’s aging star gets off to
a hot start.WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE:
He’s just maximizing
his leverage, but he’ll
be back when the
games start to
count.WHAT IT
ACTUALLY
MEANS:
He hates
the front
office,
and he’s
leaving
as soon
as he can.THE SITUATION:
Your team’s best
player’s contract
holdout has
stretched into
the second half of
August.THE
SITUATION:
An undrafted
rookie receiver
is gashing
defenses for
touchdown after
touchdown.WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE:
You’re screwed.WHAT IT ACTUALLY
MEANS:
You’re really
screwed.THE SITUATION:
Your quarterback
broke his leg.THE SITUATION:
Your team was chosen to play in the Hall of
Fame game.WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE:
The dynasty is collapsing
and this is the year you guys finally
reach the top.WHAT IT ACTUALLY MEANS:
Bill Belichick didn’t want to give
anyone any tape to study.THE SITUATION:
AFTER SIGNING
A CEREMONIAL
ONE-DAY CONTRACT
TO RETIRE WITH THE
STEVEN JACKSON WAS SUMMONED
BY THE LEAGUE FOR A DRUG TEST.
∑ ARIZONA CARDINALS
HEAD COACH KLIFF
KINGSBURY on
his depiction in
this year’s edition
of the NFL video
game Madden“ I L O O K
L I K E I ’ M
ON T H E
WA L K I N G
DEAD.”
TH
EY
S
AI
D
I
T
S
IG
N
O
F^
TH
E^
AP
O
CA
LY
PS
E
SCORECARD
SIM
ON
(^) BR
UTY
(^) (CR
UZ,
(^) BE
LL)
; (^) DA
VID
(^) E.
KLU
TH
O (^) (
BEL
ICH
ICK
, (^) JA
CKS
ON
); (^) T
WIT
TER
(MA
DDE
N);
(^) RO
SS
D. (^) F
RAN
KLI
N/A
P/S
HU
TTE
RST
OC
K (^) (
KIN
GSB
UR
Y)