The Hollywood Reporter – August 14, 2019

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THE HOLLYWOOD REPORTER 20 AUGUST 14, 2019

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An FYC Plea: ‘Put Me

Out of My Misery’

One Good Place writer is hell-bent on winning an Emmy, and she’s OK if that means inspiring

the TV Academy to change rules and flirting with her own financial ruin BY MEGAN AMRAM

I try not to beg, but please. I am

on my knees (honor system, just

believe me). Consider voting for

me to win an Emmy. Set me free.

My name is Megan Amram. I’m

a comedy writer, and there are

two things I care about in terms of my career.

One is making television that inspires people,

makes them laugh, feel less alone, realize

there are good people and good actions left in

the world. The other is winning awards.

My primary job is writing for the NBC show

The Good Place, which was nominated for best

comedy series this year. That’s awesome! But

one nomination is not nearly enough for me.

See, the thing is, I would really like to win

an Emmy. That is why I made a web series

called An Emmy for Megan. So that I can win an

Emmy. For me. (I’m Megan.)

My show is all about my quest to win an

Emmy. I wrote, directed, starred, executive

produced and set-designed it. Technically, I

also catered, since the set was my house and

I let the PAs eat some saltines I have in my

cupboard for when I get the stomach flu. In

my totally unbiased opinion, my performance

in my web series is literally the best acting of

anyone in the past two centuries — including

Matthew McConaughey in Serenity, an insane

movie I highly recommend you see. I laugh,

I cry, I do my own stunts. In my web series, I

was murdered at the end of season one. My

death scene was — again, unbiased — extraor-

dinary. One person said it was “better than

Matthew McConaughey in the movie Serenity.”

The person was me.

And it worked! I was nominated for two

Emmys last year: best short form series and

best actress in a short form series. But then,

tragedy struck. I lost not one but both. I was

humiliated at the Creative Arts Emmys in

front of my closest friends, family and enter-

tainment lawyers. I have spent the past year

asking myself why. Why did I get so close, only

to fail at the most important thing a human

and a woman can pursue? The only answer I

could think of was: I wasn’t good enough.

That’s why, for my second season, I made

the show better. I made it bigger. I acted

harder. I shared the spotlight with Patton

Oswalt. And it paid off, sort of. My show was

yet again nominated for best short form

series, and Patton Oswalt was nominated

for best actor. But I was metaphorically —

and frankly, literally — slapped in the face

when I wasn’t nominated for best actress.

I have made myself indelible to the

Academy. There have been rule changes for

the web series category that I can’t for certain

say were because of me, but I can certainly say

they weren’t not because of me. For example,

I made an episode last year that pointed out

that there was no minimum time require-

ment for web series episodes. Lo and behold,

this year there is a new rule that each episode

has to be at least two minutes long. Literally

millions of people win Emmys every year, but

how many people can say they inspired an

Emmy rule change? I should win an Emmy for

best Emmy rule change (female)!

I need this award. If I don’t win, I’m going

to have to keep making the series until I do.

And, frankly, that will destroy me. It’s not like

it’s easy. In addition to shooting and creating

the series, I have paid for all the marketing

myself, which includes but is not limited to

five billboards in the L.A. area, a sky banner

pulled by a plane, lawn signs, an ArcLight

screening and some future surprises. If I have

to do this for any longer, I guarantee that I

will go bankrupt. I’m probably going to come

live with you if I do. I am begging. Put me out

of my misery.

One question I get a lot is, “Do you actu-

ally want to win an Emmy?” To which my

answer is always, “Yes, of course.” I’ve already

picked out where it will go. It will go in my

home office. You probably haven’t been to

my house, but trust me, it will look great

there. There’s natural lighting, and you’ll

have to pass it to get to the bathroom. It’s a

perfect spot.

Thank you so much for your time and con-

sideration. I’ve been on my knees this whole

time, and now I’ll get up and keep my fingers

crossed that this reaches the people it needs

to. Hopefully, I’ll see you soon from the awards

stage! And if not, please don’t feel sorry for

me. Actually, no, scratch that — feel very sorry

for me. I’m not strong. I need this.

After a streaming debut, the entire first season of An Emmy for

Megan aired on IFC as 2018 Emmy telecast counterprogramming.

I

Megan Amram is a writer and co-executive

producer on the NBC comedy The Good Place.