The Boston Globe - 02.08.2019

G10 The Boston Globe FRIDAY, AUGUST 2, 2019

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FridayAugust2, 2019 Movies Sports News Specials Poweredby

Jeff Daniels is coming back to TV, after his
stage workas Atticus Finch in “To Kill a Mocking-
bird.” After “The Newsroom,” “Godless,” and “The
Looming Tower,” he wants more.
The actor, who won Emmys for “The News-
room” and “Godless,” will star in “Rust.” Show-
time has given the project, based on the novel
“American Rust” by Philipp Meyer, a straight-to-
series orderafter USA let go of it. In the family
drama,Danielswill play a compromisedpolice

chief in southwest Pennsylvania.

The show will be written and executivepro-

ducedby Dan Futterman,who was nominated

for an Oscarfor his “Capote”and “Foxcatcher”

screenplay work. Futterman, knownas an actor

in “The Birdcage” and “Judging Amy,” also wrote

for “In Treatment” and “The Looming Tower.” He

has a local connection: He’s married to Anya Ep-

stein, also a writer-producer, who grew up in

these here parts.

Q.My boyfriend and I have been together for

about 3½ years. We started dating our se-

nior year of college and have been long-dis-

tance ever since we graduated, because I re-

located to a different city for a job. We see

each other about once a month, and he is se-

riously the best. I love him and his family,

and everyone in my life thinks he’s great,

too.IcandefinitelyseehimbeingtheguyI

marry, and I would be really happy with that

outcome.

My problem is that the long-distance re-

lationship is getting to me. It’s been over two

years now and I am exhausted from the

plane rides, the FaceTime calls, and the fact

that we only ever see each other one week-

end a month. We’ve always talked about

closing the gap and want it to happen, but

it’s just not there yet. He’s tried to get trans-

ferred to someoffices up here, but nothing

has panned out for him.

I feel like the logical next step would be

for me to move to where he is, but I’m wor-

ried I won’t be able to find a job in the field

that I’m working in right now, which is why

I moved away to begin with. Additionally, I

live close to my family right now and have a

lot of friends. I do love the city that he lives

in, so I wouldn’t be completely unhappy

there, but I’m worried about what I’m giving

up. I just don’t know if it’s a smart decision

for me to give up everything and move for a

boy. I feel like I’d be sacrificing so much just

for this relationship, but at the same time I

want this relationship to continue. I’m wor-

ried that if we stay long-distance for too

much longer, I’m going to get tired and frus-

trated of it all and lose this perfect guy. Do I

move for love or stay put and focus on what

I have right now?

LONELY

A.Perhaps you can start by asking people to

help you find job leadsin his city. You don’t

have to move without any plan in place. It’s

possible you can line up some ideas for work

before you get there.

You can also think a little about friend-

ship. When you’re in his city, do you see any-

one else? Maybe you can take somevacation

days, extend the trip, and spend time with

others — or even wander around on your

own. Remind yourself that you can build a

larger community after you move.

Relocating would be a risk, of course. You

might pick up and leave, and then wish you

hadn’t. There’s no way to know until you

take the leap.But it sounds like you want to

— or wanthimto (can he try again?). Re-

gardless, the more important pointin you’re

letter is that you’re ready to see if this rela-

tionship could be your future.

I wouldn’t see this as “giving up every-

thing and moving for a boy.” That’s not fair.

The two of you are working together to take

the next step in your relationship. There’s no

shame in that.

MEREDITH

READERSRESPOND:

You should BOTH be looking for jobs in

each other’s city. If nothing pans out after a

few months, someone has to be willing to

take the leap.Some things to consider: who

makesmore$$,doessomeonehavean

apartmentthat can accommodate both of

you? Big picture, which city makes the most

sense for you guys?

BOSTONSWEETS21

1. Stop calling him a “boy,” especially if
   you have already sized him up for a husband
   suit.


2. Look for and find a job before you
   move to be with him.


3. While he isn’t perfect (don’t put that
   onus on anyone; it’s unfair and will only lead
   to disappointment later), if he is as great as
   you say, the sacrifice of moving from where
   you are should be worth it.
   CRUCIFIEDZEOFF

You should both have a competition to be

the first to find a job in the other’s city.

HARRISBLACKWOODSTONE

Maybe they could both try to find jobs in

another city and move there together. Then

they’d be on a level playing field and they’d

both be making an equal commitment to the

relationship.

PHATALISTIC

Columnandcomments are editedand

reprinted fromboston.com/loveletters. Send

letters to [email protected].

LOVELETTERS

BYMEREDITHGOLDSTEIN

Should I move to close

the distance?

MIKE BLAKE/REUTERS/FILE

Jeff Danielswon an Emmy Award in 2013for his role in “The Newsroom.”

TVCRITIC’S CORNER

BYMATTHEWGILBERT

Daniels to star in Showtime’s ‘Rust’ drama