Feeling like the
odd one out
got worse
when I went
to secondary
school. Once,
I pretended to
feel sick to
escape being
weighed in a
science classMAXINE’S JOURNEY
Operations to correct my leg
meant spending a lot of my
childhood laid up in bed
correct it, and that meant
spending months in a plaster
cast from my hip to my toes,
unable to get out of bed. Looking
back, this was when I first started
seeking comfort in food, as my
family would buy me chocolate
bars, biscuits and sweets to try
to cheer me up.
Even when I could get out of
bed, my leg was very weak and
I walked with a limp. I’d watch
longingly from our front doorstep
as Adele skated up and down the
street on her roller blades.
I couldn’t join in with any of her
outdoor fun, but while I yearned
to be more like her, I never once held it against her.
She was always the one who would curl up on my bed
with me to watch endless Disney films, and stayed by
my side when I was too poorly to get up. After all the
surgery, my left leg ended up an inch shorter than
my right, which meant my shoes required expensive,
specially made insoles. As I headed into my teens,
I’d have done just about anything to be able to wear
a pair of Adele’s pretty, sparkly heels, rather than my
practical, comfortable and unfashionable shoes.
The wake-up call
The bigger I got, the more I stood out at school, and
I became so painfully shy about my appearance that
I found it hard to make new friends. By the time
I left school at 16, I was around 20st, and my weight
continued to rise through college. As I started my
first job as a nursery nurse, I tried one drastic diet
after another – including surviving on shakes and
taking appetite-curbing supplements before meals.
Nothing worked and, worse still, each failed diet
lowered my self-esteem a little further, convincing
me I’d be overweight forever. Eventually, I gave up
trying. Instead, I’d comfort myself with a takeaway
three or four times a week,
something like a 14-inch pizza
with chips and a family-size
tiramisu. And as my weight
continued to rise, the pains
in my joints became so severe
I started needing two crutches
just to get about.
At work, I couldn’t crawl
around after the children or sit
with them during carpet time,
as I knew I wouldn’t be able
to get back up again. And at
the weekends, going shopping
with Adele and my mum,
Yvonne, left me utterly deflated.
There was only one shop on
our high street that had the size-34 clothes I needed.
So I trailed around after them, gasping for breath
with every step, knowing it wasn’t even worth
looking at what was on the rails.
I was 34 years old when I had a fall at home, and
everything changed. My knee gave way and stopped
supporting my weight, which meant I could fall again
at any time. I couldn’t risk hurting one of the children
at work, so with a heavy heart, I handed in my notice.
Working with children had always been my dream
and now I felt like I was heading down a long, dark
tunnel with no way out. Then, in January 2012, I felt
a sharp pain in my chest. I wasn’t too worried, but after
it happened a few more times I went to see my GP. He
examined me, taking my blood pressure, listening to
my chest and weighing me – I was a shade under 30st.
Then he looked me squarely in the eyes. ‘If you don’t
do something now, you could die,’ he said. ‘It might be
as soon as a year, or 18 months – the weight you’re
carrying on such a small frame, is highly dangerous.’
I sat there in shock as he called up the bariatric
clinic at Sunderland Royal Hospital and made an
appointment for me to discuss a gastric bypass with
the specialist. He also prescribed slimming pills, andTHEN As my
size increased,
I struggled to
walk without
crutchesNOW The
pain in my
joints has
all but gone
and I can run
around after
my nephewMy sister
Adele was
always there
for me, no
matter what.
Here I am in
my bridesmaid
dress on her
wedding day,
thrilled to see
her so happyI’d put on a brave face
as my self-esteem fell
lower and lower10 SLIMMING WORLD MAGAZINE