15-05-2021-052358It-Ends-with-Us

The next thing he said made his blue eyes tear up until they looked clear. He
said, “Lily. Life is a funny thing. We only get so many years to live it, so we
have to do everything we can to make sure those years are as full as they can be.
We shouldn’t waste time on things that might happen someday, or maybe even
never.”
I knew what he was saying. That he was leaving for the military and he
didn’t want me to hold on to him while he was gone. He wasn’t really breaking
up with me because we weren’t ever really together. We’d just been two people
who helped each other when we needed it and got our hearts fused together
along the way.
It was hard, being let go by someone who had never really grabbed hold of
me completely in the first place. In all the time we’ve spent together, I think we
both sort of knew this wasn’t a forever thing. I’m not sure why, because I could
easily love him that way. I think maybe under normal circumstances, if we were
together like typical teenagers and he had an average life with a home, we could
be that kind of couple. The kind who comes together so easily and never
experiences a life where cruelty sometimes intercepts.
I didn’t even try to get him to change his mind that night. I feel like we have
the kind of connection that even the fires of hell couldn’t sever. I feel like he
could go spend his time in the military and I’ll spend my years being a teenager
and then it will all fall back into place when the timing is right.
“I’m going to make a promise to you,” he said. “When my life is good
enough for you to be a part of it, I’ll come find you. But I don’t want you to
wait around for me, because that might never happen.”
I didn’t like that promise, because it meant one of two things. Either he
thought he might never make it out of the military alive, or he didn’t think his
life would ever be good enough for me.
His life was already good enough for me, but I nodded my head and forced
a smile. “If you don’t come back for me, I’ll come for you. And it won’t be
pretty, Atlas Corrigan.”
He laughed at my threat. “Well, it won’t be too hard to find me. You know
exactly where I’ll be.”
I smiled. “Where everything is better.”
He smiled back. “In Boston.”
And then he kissed me.
Ellen, I know you’re an adult and know all about what comes next, but I
still don’t feel comfortable telling you what happened over those next couple of