ANNE BONNY
Anne was born in 1702, the lovechild of a servant lady and a lawyer
who was cheating on his wife. Since word had gotten out that
Anne’s dad had an illegitimate daughter, he dressed her as a boy
and called her Andy. Legend tells of Anne getting mighty shitty at
times: at 13, she allegedly stabbed a servant girl with a table knife,
and bludgeoned a man who tried to rape her (which, to be honest,
is quite OK). Not long after, she ditched the bloke to whom her
father betrothed her, opting instead to marry a pirate by the name
of James Bonny. For this, her father cut off all ties. Arm in arm
with Jimmy, Anne moved to the Bahamas – a sanctuary for English
pirates at the time – where she started hanging out at pirate-
packed watering holes. It was here that she hooked up with famous
pirate Calico Jack, captain of the pirate ship Revenge. Following
the birth of their baby boy, Anne divorced Jim and, along with her
newfound pal Mary Read, stole a ship and successfully snagged a
bunch of treasure in the Jamaica area. Anne fought alongside pirate
dudes, and was noted for her prowess in combat. When they were
eventually arrested and Jack was sentenced to death, her last words
to him (apparently) were: “Had you fought like a man, you need not
have been hanged like a dog.” Anne escaped execution, but no one
knows how or what happened to her afterwards. She was 18.
...................
MARY READ
Think your family life’s complicated? You’ve got nothing on Mary
Read. Born in 1685, Mary was, like Anne, the result of a secret
affair. Mary’s mum’s husband, a sailor, was lost at sea. Then their
son died. So, her mum hatched a plan: dress Mary up like a boy,
tell the in-laws she’s her dead half-brother, and continue receiving
their financial support. It worked. As for Mary, she never stopped
dressing like a boy, even as an adult. She got a job on a ship, joined
the British military, and proved herself to be a top soldier. When
action died down, she hoofed it to the West Indies, but was taken
by pirates en route. Thinking Mary a guy, the pirates forced her to
join their ranks, and she eventually crossed paths with Anne Bonny
and Calico Jack. The big historical controversy (at least, as far as
the internet’s concerned) is whether or not Anne and Mary were
‘pirates with benefits’. Apparently Mary – who went by the name of
her deceased half-bro, Mark – only revealed to Anne that she was
a woman after Anne put the moves on her. Then Jack cracked it,
accusing them of having an affair. Anne told Jack he had nothing
to stress over, because Mary was actually a girl – even though that
obviously doesn’t rule out sexy times. Mary was captured along with
Anne and Jack, and died from a violent fever while in prison.
...................
SADIE THE GOAT
If you happened to be wandering around New York’s ‘bloody’
fourth ward in the latter half of the 19th century, you’d want to
avoid a chinwag with local lass Sadie Farrell, aka Sadie the Goat.
The odds were, once she had you close enough, she’d headbutt
you in the stomach (hence the goat moniker), then rob you. She
did get on people’s nerves doing this – Gallus Mags’ nerves, in
particular. Gallus was a local female bouncer, who was known
to drag unwanted patrons out of her venue by the ear... with her
teeth. She also bit Sadie’s ear off in a fight, and pickled it for
safekeeping. In 1869, Sadie, an ear short, happened to be on the
waterfront, observing the notorious Charlton Street Gang sucking
at stealing a ship. She offered to lead the band of river pirates,
and within days they’d stolen an even bigger ship. And thus, Sadie
became a pirate herself. She sailed up and down the Hudson and
Harlem Rivers, doing the odd bit of pillaging, farm-raiding and
mansion-robbing. She made a few men walk the plank, too, adding
‘ritualised murder’ to the skills section of her CV. Although her
pirate career only lasted a few months (she figured it was probably
too dangerous when farmers started firing back at them), she
earned a second nickname: Queen of the Waterfront. She also
made a truce with Gallus Mag, who gave her ear back. Sadie kept
it in a locket and wore it till she died....................
CHING SHIH
Here’s a lesson you can take from Madame Ching: when you marry
a Chinese pirate captain, always make sure he agrees to share
his power with you, and lets you fully participate in his piracy –
otherwise, what’s the point? Ching was working as a prostitute
when she married the pirate Cheng I, and together they pirated up
a storm in the South China Sea. When Cheng died in 1807, Ching
devoted herself to the family pirate business, which, by that point,
comprised a crew of around 40,000 ruffians, aka the Red Flag
Fleet. Her first order of business was to set up a code of laws,
which dictated that a) anyone giving orders that didn’t come from
Ching herself would be beheaded; b) anyone disobeying a superior
would be beheaded; c) pirates that took a wife had to be faithful;
d) pirates that raped women would be killed; and e) if a pirate had
consensual sex with a female captive, the pirate would be beheaded
and the female would have cannonballs attached to her legs and
be thrown into the sea. Under Ching’s rule, the Red Flag Fleet was
unconquerable – until 1810, when the Portuguese Navy got the
better of them at the Battle of the Tiger’s Mouth. Ching accepted
the Chinese government’s offer of amnesty; called it a day with the
water-based shenanigans; took her booty and opened a casino. She
died at 69, at peace and with grandchildren....................CHARLOTTE BADGER
Considered by many to be Australia’s first female pirate, Charlotte
Badger was born in England to impoverished parents, who she tried
to support by stealing a few guineas and a silk handkerchief when
she was 18. This indiscretion earned her seven years’ penal servitude
in New South Wales. She wound up at the fucked-up-sounding
Parramatta Female Factory (something in between a prison and a
workhouse), where she gave birth to a baby girl. With her newborn in
tow, she jumped aboard The Venus, a ship bound for Van Diemen’s
Land – aka Tasmania – to carry out the remainder of her sentence
as a servant. The ship’s captain, one Samuel Chase, enjoyed flogging
women for his entertainment, which shat Charlotte and her fellow
convict Catherine Hagerty. Together, they convinced the men to
mutiny and seize the ship while the captain was ashore – Charlotte
(apparently) got in on the action, dressing as a dude and getting her
mitts on a pistol with which she flogged the captain right back. With
a cargo of supplies intended for Hobart, the pirate crew detoured
across the Tasman and jumped off at Rangihoua Bay in the Bay of
Islands, New Zealand, where Charlotte’s co-conspirator, Catherine,
soon died. Little is known of Charlotte thereafter, but it’s believed she
integrated with the local Maori community. She was twice offered
passage back to Sydney and refused, saying she would prefer to die
surrounded by her Maori pals.a pirate’s life for she
INTRODUCING SOME OF HISTORY’S
MOST INFAMOUS LADY BUCCANEERS.
Wor d s Mia Timpano
learn something new