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Shahida Arabi, MA
Instagram: @selfcarewarrior | shahidaarabi.comHighly sensitive people are more responsive to the emotions of
others. For example, studies show a correlation between high sen-
sitivity and the heightened activation of brain regions involved in
empathy, action planning, and self-other processing in response
to emotive facial expressions. This enhanced empathy for others
unfortunately works against HSPs in toxic relationships. Since
manipulators engage in what Dr. Martha Stout calls “pity plays,”
attempts to garner sympathy after incidents of abuse or betrayal,
this causes highly sensitive people to overly sympathize with
those who hurt them.Highly sensitive people are predisposed to be more reactive to
both positive and negative emotional stimuli. As a result, they
may attempt to skirt around conflict and remain in toxic relation-
ships to avoid additional stressors. They may walk on eggshells
and be more conscientious than the average person of “offending”
their loved ones. Dr. George Simon notes that conscientiousness
is a trait that manipulators look for because conscientious people
prioritize the welfare of others over their own needs and follow
through on obligations. Unfortunately, this avoidance of conflict
usually leads to an inability to establish and maintain boundaries.As a result, they may rationalize red flags and may be more
vulnerable to gaslighting tactics. Since high sensitivity is a trait
only present in a certain subset of the population, HSPs often
undergo scrutiny regarding their natural proclivities. HSPs also
tend to have rich inner lives and a high degree of introspec-
tion—this can inadvertently lead them to self-criticism and self-
blame even when they are being abused. When they become
entrenched in toxic relationships, HSPs are not only convinced
by manipulators that they are “overreacting,” they also tend
to gaslight themselves due to societal programming that has
caused them to doubt their own emotions and instincts.If you are a highly
sensitive person
it’s important to note that your greater depth of
processing, intuition, and empathy for others are gifts to
be protected. When used strategically , these natural abilities
can actually help you to detach from rather than attach to
toxic people—so long as you learn to trust your inner voice.A highly sensitive person’s capacity
for empathy and conscientiousness
is appealing to narcissistic
individuals who rely on emotional
manipulation to exploit others.Conflict can be overwhelming
on a highly sensitive person’s
nervous system.Highly sensitive people have been
told they’re “too sensitive” their
whole lives.“Conscientousness is a
trait that manipulators look
for because conscientous people
prioritze the welfare of others
ovr their own needs and follow
through on obligatons.”
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High sensitivity is a genetic trait that causes people to be more
attuned to their environment, more emotionally responsive,
and more empathic to others. According to researchers, highly
sensitive people make up 15 to 20 percent of the population.
Despite their high level of intuition and depth of processing,
highly sensitive people may find themselves entangled in
toxic relationships, friendships, or even work environments
that overwhelm them.As a self-help author, I’ve communicated with thousands of
highly sensitive individuals who have been in relationships
with people who have narcissistic and psychopathic traits;
such traits include characteristics like a lack of empathy, a
penchant for exploiting others, even a lack of remorse. While
highly sensitive people and narcissistic individuals are quite
different, there are reasons why HSPs tend to be the targets of
toxic personalities.3 Reasons Why Highly
Sensitive People Are
Targeted by Narcissists
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