260 CultureShock! China
SITUATION 10
You have decided to have a first dinner out in your new city
with your six-month-old son. You sit down in a restaurant
and the waitress swoops over, coos at your child in Chinese,
then picks him up and trots off to show him to a gaggle of
other waitresses. You should: Scream for the police.
Step in front of the waitress, explain politely but firmly
that you don’t want your child touched by strangers, and
take your son back.
Relax and let the waitress babysit your son while you enjoy
your meal.
Smile, stand and follow the waitress, letting her understand
that you’re happy she shares your joy in your son, and
that you are also available to keep an eye on him.Comments
This common situation is one of the most jarring for new
parents in China, whose instinct often tells them to do .
The trouble is, of course, that the waitress intended no harm,
is less damaging, but will still brand you as rather cold
and untrusting. is probably the best balance, at least at
first—although in time, if you have a good view of him just
in case he becomes upset, particularly on repeat visits to the
same restaurant, you may well find you can relax into !