Competition in Friendship 215that do not call for it, turning friendly activities into contests, and feeling power-
ful and superior when outdoing others. A number of other researchers have found
variations of this type of competitive orientation as “performance goals” (Dweck
& Elliott, 1983), “interpersonal competition” (Griffin- Pierson, 1990), “other-
referenced competition” (Tassi & Schneider, 1997), and “competing to win”
(Hibbard & Buhrmester, 2010).
It’s Not Winning That’s Important, but W hether
You Have ImprovedA second dimension of competitiveness is derived from the social psychological
sense of an individualistic orientation, with the goal of improving one’s own capa-
bilities. The focus is on competence and improvement relative to one’s own past
accomplishments rather than on one’s status relative to others. This form of com-
petitiveness is characterized by a drive to surpass one’s past performance, absolute
standards, or even physical challenges (e.g., “conquering” a mountain). Researchers
have found a plethora of evidence for this dimension of competitiveness in the form
of “learning goals” (Dweck & Elliot, 1983; Dweck & Leggett, 1988), “goal com-
petitiveness” (Griffin- Pierson, 1990), “personal development competitiveness”
(Ryckman, Hammer, Kaczor, & Gold, 1996), “task- oriented competition” (Tassi &
Schneider, 1997), and “competing to excel” (Hibbard & Buhrmester, 2010).
Although competitive people are often respected and admired in many cultures,
it is also possible that their drive to win can undermine friendships. H. S. Sullivan
(1953) argued that competition leads to less intimacy and support in close relation-
ships, but he was likely talking about the traditional definition of competition as the
desire to outperform others rather than the drive for personal excellence. We now
turn to research that has examined the role of competition and competitiveness in
friendship throughout the life span, as well as the social and interpersonal implica-
tions of competition between friends.
The Role of Competition in Friendship Across
the Life Span
Research regarding the impact of competition on friendship has typically been
framed in terms of two general contentions. On the one hand, competition is
thought to be an inevitable component of the human condition, and social com-
parison among close others is believed to be necessary for one to measure his or her
own achievements against others to get a sense of one’s own mastery level (Tassi &
Schneider, 1997). Although Sullivan (1953) maintained that more hostile forms
of rivalry could destroy friendships, he also suggested that some benign forms of
competition might actually help youth (especially boys) realize their abilities and