Reader\'s Digest Canada - 05.2020

Are you in need of some

professional motivation?

Send us a work anecdote,

and you could receive

$50. To submit your

stories, visit rd.ca/joke.

Sorry I’m late. Traffic is

exactly how it’s been

every day for the past

five years and I was not

expecting that.

— @KARENKILGARIFF

Your salary is just your

company’s monthly

subscription of you.

— @HIRANIMEERA

First Day as a Bartender

Customer: I’ll have a

martini, dry.

Me, staring at all the

liquid ingredients: I

don’t know how to tell

you this ...

— @KYLEPLANTEMOJI

Office Meteorologist

I deleted my weather

app because there’s a

guy at work who always

tells me what the

weather is anyway, and

the app never asks how

my weekend was.

— @LEAKYPOD

Special Skills

If you put away the

clean laundry on the

same day that you wash

it, I feel like that’s what

you should lead with on

your resume.

— @ABBYHASISSUES

Career Goal

I never in life want to be

the kind of successful

that requires getting to

an airport before 7 a.m.

— @TRESSIEMCPHD

Co-worker: Hey, can

you take my shift?

Me: Of course!

Me: Hey, so it turns out

I have open-heart sur-

gery on Tuesday. I

know it’s kind of late

notice, but do you

think you could pick

up my shift?

Co-worker: Sorry,

Tuesday is my dog’s

half-birthday. Other-

wise I totally would.

— @MYLA_LOECKE

“John’s our CFO: creative financial officer.”

SUSAN CAMILLERI KONAR

rd.ca 91

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